Showing posts with label Video. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Video. Show all posts
3.10.2015
Snippe-dipp-dipp-snippedi-snopp!
My ol' friend Levi posted this thing on my FB page a couple month ago, and for some terrible reason I didn't see it until this weekend. It's sad because what he posted is a fun, and weird, and vulva related video, and I'm like way into all those things.
Basically it's a little 1 minute video made for Swedish kids that has a penis and a vulva - just some some good old fashioned cartoon anatomy learnin'. I found a translation HERE that I'm posting below. It's not like official or anything. It's just some shit I found on the internet, but you can run it through Google Translate if you feel you need to to check its accuracy.
You'll notice that it says in one part "Pee pee through the penis or the vagina (I think it's actually not vagina but a child-like word for girl parts) if you're a girl." Of course I would prefer a more clear description of boy and girl parts to be used for kids - something like the 3 and 1 description - Boys have 1 organ for pleasure, peeing, and reproduction. Girls have a clitoris for pleasure, the pee-hole for peeing, and the vagina for reproduction. I just think that girl parts too often get lumped together too much and in a way that it seems like the only important part down there is the hole (which a lot of people think pee comes out of as well as babies.) However, I'm not going to poo-poo on a well-meaning children's cartoon about genitals. I mean, come on, we need more age-appropriate sex education for the young folk, and some is better than the pretty much none we have now.
Go Go Snoppen och Snippan!
Original
Popi-dopp-pop snippedi snopp!
Här kommer snoppen i full galopp.
Han som inga brallor har dinglar med
snoppen och rumpan bar.
Snippe-dipp-dipp-snippedi-do!
Snippan är häftig, ja det kan du tro.
Till och med på en gammal tant
snippan sitter där så elegant.
Så olika med nästan samma grej
Kissa kiss igenom snoppen eller snippan om man är tjej.
Snoppen och snippan vilket härligt gäng
Snippan och snoppen sjunger vår refräng
Snoppen och snippan finns på vår kropp
Snippe-dipp-dipp-snippedi-snopp!
Popi-dopp-op-snippedi-snopp
Hänger och slänger på en liten kropp
Snippe-dipp-dipp-snippedi-do
Snippan är häftig, Baby I Love You.
Translation
Popi-dopp-pop snippedi snopp (jibberish)
Here comes the penis in full speed
He who wears no pants
dangles with the penis and ass free
Snippe-dipp-dipp-snippedi-do! (more jibberish)
The vagina is awesome, you better believe it
Even on an old aunt
the vagina sits there so elegant
So different, but almost the same thing
Pee pee through the penis, or the vagina if you’re a girl.
The penis and the vagina, what a lovely gang
The penis and the vagina sings our chorus
The penis and the vagina is on our body
Snippe-dipp-dipp-snippedi-snopp!
Popi-dopp-op-snippedi-snopp
Hanging there on a small body
Snippe-dipp-dipp-snippedi-do
The vagina is awesome, baby I love you
*Update - I just realized the video has the translation too, but it's still nice to see it all written out below too.
2.10.2015
Santa Paws, Brazil, and The Right Kind of Lust
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12.15.2014
Science of Orgasm Video
I kept seeing this Science of the Orgasm video on Facebook, and I finally checked it out. I put it off because I thought it was really long, but it was actually only 2 minutes and 45 seconds, so I probably should have just watched it when I first saw it.
If you want my assessment of this video, and I can only assume you do because you're reading my blog, then fine, I'll give it to you. It's okay, ya know. In general it's not like way off base or anything, but it's also a little too sure in statements it shouldn't be be, and it's also kinda skipping over some stuff I think is important for people to know. Granted, most people get little to no education about the physical qualities of orgasm in our school system, so anything is probably good. I seriously didn't learn about what arousal and orgasm actually does in my body until I was in my 20's and researching for what would become Science, Sex and the Ladies, so I'm not going to knock this.
Here's what I think should be pointed out about this video though:
1 When it says that blood starts to flow to the genitals, it doesn't also point out what that means for ladies. We all know what it means for dudes, but I don't think many people know that the increased blood flow is what makes lubrication begin seeping from the vaginal walls, or that as much blood pools down there for women as it does for men. I just think that knowing a simple thing like that could change an outlook a bit.
2 It describes male orgasm as 3-10 seconds followed by a refractory period, and it describes female orgasm as 20 plus minutes with no refraction period, and it doesn't even hint that there might be variation. In actuality, the best study on this topic (Masters and Johnson's Human Sexual Response from the late 60's), observed male orgasm basically as described, but it described female orgasm in 3 different ways.
A. just like the male type was described
B. multiple orgasms, each lasting a few seconds and needing continued clitoral stimulation for a number of second between each consecutive little orgasm. This last 2, 3 or sometimes a bit more orgasms, and all the little orgasms and stimulation in between could last a few minutes-ish at most.
C. Status Orgasmus...maybe quick multiple orgasms, maybe one long continuous orgasm that would last 20 seconds to a minute, but they found it to be rare.
So I think the ladygasm description on this video was a bit misleading because it was kinda a mix of the last 2 types and it ignored the possibility of the 3rd type. Plus, and it's not common at all, but men can also be multi-orgasmic, seemingly as long as he can manage to not ejaculate along with his orgasm. There was a man in this study who was recorded doing this.
3 This video says that during orgasm, relaxation of the hippocampus and the amygdala "in women further reduces emotion, producing a trance-like state, while in men it dampens aggressiveness." Really, we're sure of that? All women with the trance-like state when we come and all men with the low aggression when they nus? Really? So, there's a deep well of successfully replicated, peer reviewed studies proving pretty certainly that these badly defined and complicated states of being such as "trance state" "reduced emotion" or "dampened aggression" are specifically what's happening to people during orgasm and that it is split straight down the middle this way for men vs. women? I would bet a lot of money that this isn't the case. And if it is, I'd like more info about this because there are a lot of studies out there about what certain hormones or physical events "do" to people emotionally and behaviorally, and they often contradict each other. It's just that I'm awfully sensitive to "sciency" stuff spouting off in concrete ways about complicated, nuanced shit they don't really understand or care to explain fully. That way of speaking about information is irresponsible at best. I'm a bit of a stickler in that regard, so I just wanted to point out this we-will-unabashedly-speak-concretely-about-a-complicated-subtle-topic-even-though-it's-way-overreaching situation that was happening there.
Okay, that's it. Check out the video.
2.20.2014
Is Ejaculation an Orgasm? Betty Dodson Tells Ya Straight
I'm sure I've mentioned before that I think Betty Dodson is kick ass. Well I agree with myself once again. Betty and her cohort Carlin Ross answer the question in their vlog, "Is female ejaculation an orgasm?" Hells no. Ejaculation is ejaculation. Betty lays that shit down straight. I. Love. It. All too often, the word "orgasm" is used to describe all kinds of things that are not actually orgasms.
It's a confusing problematic aspect of sexpert talk in an already confusing sexual culture for us ladies. I'm over it, and I think Betty might be too. If anyone is fighting the good fight for the Orgasm Equality Movement, these ladies are! Check it out.
2.11.2014
Cunnilingus Video from Key and Peele - Happy Tuesday!
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11.29.2013
New Trailer for Science, Sex and the Ladies!
That's right, we cut a new trailer! Science, Sex and the Ladies is almost a finished movie, and it was time for a newer, fresher one. What's also super awesome about this is that the music is from our score that was recently recorded out in L.A. The only thing left for SSL to be complete is the the final sound sweetening on the last 1/3 last third of the movie.
Ah, this has been a long, long road to get here, and we're so close now. So, please enjoy our trailer. Oh- and please share if it strikes your fancy....and if ya want, you can like our movie troupe on Facebook...or not, I'll still "like" you either way (oh yeah, I stand by that pun - if one could even call that a pun). http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pfQW9ozrdWo
8.13.2013
I Put My Own Definition Of The Word Binner Into Urban Dictionary
I enjoy reading Urban Dictionary from time to time. It can be hilarious or terrible or disturbing or insane, and I just enjoy the ride. So, I got to thinking maybe I should add something to the ol' Urban Dictionary...something like binner (the inner boner). I looked up what it currently has for binner, and it's all stupid crap. Check it out for yourself. You can down votes some if you want. My definition is still under review by the editors, but when it's up, I'm gonna ask you all to go upvote my binner definition, cause I'm not gonna lie - I'd be pretty stoked to have a top definition in Urban Dictionary, people. I'd pretty much be a highlight for me.
Anyway, I just wanted to tell you about it. Also you should look up your name. Here's the top Urban Dictionary definition of my name:
Medium height, big butt, brown hair, brown eyes, nice, giggly person, eyesight usually bad, can be absolutely crazy, very attractable mainly to men, likes to dress up, wierd dancer, good girl.That's pretty much exactly correct. I hope yours is super sweet like mine is. Also here's the binner video. Also go put your own definitions in there. It's fun!
8.03.2013
Porn Sex Vs. Real Sex Explained With Food - An SSL Approved Short
Mr. Dan Garland, a lovely and humorous man from my MVHS past and Facebook present has turned me on to a video. It describes, with numbers and food, how very different porn sex is from real sex. You will enjoy this, and it makes some excellent SSL approved points.
I was fascinated by who produced this and why, so I searched back a little and found that KB Creative Labs, a NY based production company, is responsible for this. Apparently, each month they let an employee come up with a video that takes one day of shooting and one day of editing. It didn't say which employee had this ingenious idea, but I'd like to find out...and talk with him/her.
7.19.2013
A Friday AnC Movie Special: Hansel and Gretel - Don't Eat Children
Hey there - happy Friday! I've been a bit busy lately, but I haven't forgotten about you. I thought it might be fun today to post a movie that we (as in us here at AnC Movies - the ones making Science, Sex and the Ladies) made a while back...actually this was really mostly Charlie making this. It stars our niece and nephew - although from 2 different siblings. The kids aren't brother and sister. You might also see the lower body of me and Charlie, Charlie's oldest little sister, and a picture of a mattress store close to our house.
It was commissioned for a collaborative "Hansel and Gretel" influenced exhibit between the Indianapolis Museum of Contemporary Art and Indianapolis Opera and Indianapolis Public Libraries. I think it's pretty fun. Enjoy
Hansel and Gretel: Don't Eat Children from Charles Borowicz on Vimeo.
5.23.2013
Motus Dance - LIKDIT!
Well, my friends, it's time for a new installment of LIKDIT! In case you're new here, this is a slightly different-from-SSL-norm series I do, and it stands for "Ladies I
Know Doing Interesting Things!" I pronounce it
as "liked it!" and, quite importantly, I always say it in a way that one can clearly
tell there's an exclamation point at the end.Here's the lowdown. LIKDIT! women have to be people I know personally, not just any ol' gal I read about. Also, they have to be doing something sort of open to the pubic, something that is more than a job or a business, or some personal awesomeness. I gotta have rules. Otherwise, I would just have too many women in my life to include. No, it must be something more purely creative or philanthropic in nature, and she/they have to be putting themselves out there.
Which brings me to Ms. Heidi Keller Phillips and the women of Motus Dance. Motus debuted in 2003, and they've grown into a thriving little bright point of dance here in Indy over the last 10 years. I actually met Heidi around that time Motus began. She auditioned and got the part as "Woman" in a short we were doing called Embolism. So, I've kind of watched Motus grow up. Heidi was a core artist at the time, but she became the director a few years ago when the original director, a fine woman herself, went off to pursue other interests more full time.They have classes, workshops, and a full schedule of shows throughout the year, which frankly, I love watching. Now, as I say in these LIKDIT!s often, I'm no expert or professional critic. I don't know nothin' about no dancin' or no dancers. I just like what I like. The dancers choreograph and create their events from the bottom up. The performances are unique, lovely, and sometimes pretty eery, plus the costume and music choices are always superb, and often unexpected. Oh - and in the past few years, they have really figured out how to create lovely lighting that compliments the pieces and enhances the whole experience. That is kinda big in my opinion because much like sound is often neglected in indie movies, from my perspective lighting often seems neglected in indie dance and performances. They're the whole package, folks.
So, here's to the ladies of Motus Dance! I thought this was a good time for their LIKDIT! because they are holding their yearly event, Pairing, in a couple weeks (The evening of June 8th to be exact). It's pretty cool - kinda like a relaxed gourmet dinner, but during each course you get to watch a dance piece inspired by the wine you're being served. So you get wine, dance, fancy appetizers prepared by awesome local chefs, and lots of fab guests to mingle and get drunk on wine with. Go HERE for more info.Also, check this Motus promotional piece. It's quite lovely if you ask me - and created by our own Charles Borowicz (one of our Science, Sex and the Ladies directors, as I'm sure you know).
Motus Dance Pairings Teaser from Charles Borowicz on Vimeo.
5.10.2013
A Playlist and Colonel Angus to Ease in the Weekend - Clit Week Post #5
First, Charlie follows this one user, YesWeCanCan on 8Tracks, and he just found a mix from her called "Songs to Eat Girls Out To," so he promptly informed me. It's a pretty good mix - a lot of good ol' slow jams. I'd be honored to be eaten out to this mix. Check it out HERE, and if you get mouth pampered down there for the full 57 minutes of the mix, then bully for you!...or not - I don't know - maybe it wasn't so good, and that's why it took so damn long. In that case you need to talk a bit more with your partner about what you need so you can avoid over-use chafing in your nether regions and ferocious mouth/tongue exhaustion for your sexy-time friend. However, if you actually do have somebody who can't get enough face time with your junk, then for god's sake, woman, don't turn that away. You might as well ride that train and see where it leads.
Okay, next I just wanted to put up the ol' SNL Colonel Angus bit. If you haven't seen this, and wonder what it's all about, just go ahead and say "Colonel Angus" with an old-timey genteel Southern accent. I just like this. Tina Fey was the brains behind this, and I'd very much like to thank her for that. Plus Christopher Walkins is, in fact, Colonel Angus, as they note, "...once a woman is introduced to Colonel Angus, she'll settle for nothing less." You'll love him, but if he overstays his welcome, you can just tap him on the head.
Well, on that note, have a good weekend, and I'll be back at ya tomorrow.
4.22.2013
Origami Condoms: Real Good For The Gents, Nice For The Ladies Too
I don't usually go into sexual health issues here, and in fact, this isn't completely about sexual health. It's about sexual pleasure, mostly. The deal is there is this new condom that moves against the skin differently than our tried and true old school condoms. You can watch the video below to see what I mean (FYI - it has a person jerking off dildos with each type of condom - so don't watch while your boss is looking over your shoulder - unless your boss is cool).
Clearly, for men this is going to be a better experience than the old way. In fact, I think this crazy condom seems like a pretty good masturbation accessory for men - which you just can't beat...or can beat (get it, beat...the meat). Anyway, I think it'll be nicer for women too, not because it will contribute more towards arousal and orgasm as it seems it would do for men, but because I think it will keep things moister down there, and as we all know - the wetter the better. I never really dislike condoms, but I would say my biggest complaint is that they tend to make the whole thing drier, and there's sometimes a touch of pulling at the ol' entrance that I would prefer to do without. I don't know exactly why that's the case, but I always assumed that the latex created a bit more friction than skin or that the latex somehow whisked out more of the lubrication into the air during thrusts or that when out in the air, the moisture on a condom was able to dry quicker than moisture on skin. I don't really know, but it certainly seems like the way the penis moves more inside this new condom, that there would be less friction and more of a seal during penetration to keep the moisture all doin' its job down there. So, I think that's pretty cool.
If you're worried about how this might adversely affect female orgasm, then please don't. We ladies don't orgasm through stimulation of the vagina anyway, so no problems/change there (I explain that statement more HERE). I mean, if this new condom somehow kept hands or vibrators or mouths from touching our clits...now then we'd have a problem.
Like I said, I don't usually get into it here, but I think the sexual health importance is too awesome to go unnoticed. Condoms save lives, but a lot of men don't like to use condoms. Men often complain that they lessen the feeling, that they have a hard time keeping erections with condoms on, and that they hurt or pinch at times. Plus, a lot of people put them on wrong. Yeah, we could just say stop whining, and don't be dumb asses, but that's not working very well. Wouldn't it be better to just a have a condom that was super easy to put on and that men enjoyed using? This condom was recently praised on the Bill and Melinda Gates foundation blog, “Origami Condoms provides an excellent example of a private enterprise focused on new condom design to promote consistent use by emphasizing the sexual experience.” They, as do I, hope more innovative ideas are on the way.
Also, since this is the Science Sex and the Ladies Blog, I have to point out that a little more sexifying of non penetrative sex acts couldn't hurt either. If we can up the sexy status of masturbation, mutual masturbation and handies, we'd be avoiding a lot of disease, pregnancy and - bonus - also doing things that can get us ladies off.
4.17.2013
Kisses Down Low by Kelly Rowlands Added to Dirty Songs Champs
I actually don't have a lot more to say about this song. There's just not that much to it. Most of the song consists of the following lyrics:
I like my kisses down lowShe does, though, tell us right off the bat, in the opening lines to the song that see those "kisses down low" are, well, one of her favorite things, like brown paper packages tied up with string are to Julie Andrews.
Makes me arch my back
When you gave it to me slow
Baby just like that
You put in over time, over night, doing everything I like, go so right yeahThe rest of the lyrics just contain vague stuff about how hot it is, how sexy she feels, and how much she likes having sexy time with her dude. There are, happily, no unrealistic descriptions of women coming like a porn star from things that would not actually make a woman come at all; things like getting banged from behind while biting pillows or other such descriptive possibilities. There are really no discussions of coming at all, just back arching and pleasure, but it's pleasure caused from cunnilingus which is a realistic situation in which that pleasure could move forward into a straight up orgasm.
You hold me close, squeeze me tight, look me deep inside my eyes, baby you know I love it
But nothing can compare to when you kiss me there
At the end of the day, my friends, it's just a woman singing about how she likes her man to put his kisses on her lady junk - and who doesn't? However, it's also a refreshing flip to the norm; It's a woman singing about something that can realistically become an orgasmic experience for her, but that is really just work (maybe sexy work, but work none the less) for her male partner. We ladies are usually the ones putting in the work and the men are reaping the orgasmic rewards in most sexy songs, but not this time, and I think that is worth while.
4.08.2013
Peaches and Cream by 112 - SSL Dirty Song Champ
What you need to know about this song is that it doesn't include lyrics insinuating or outright saying anything unrealist or wrong about female orgasm like that a penis banging into her vag will make a lady come. It actually doesn't specifically talk about females getting off at all. However, it does talk about lickin' on some peaches and cream, know what I mean? It's dudes singing about how much they love sexy time with a woman and particularly how much they love to eat a gal out. That's great in itself, but it is also a nice balance to the many songs out there sung by women about how much they love pleasing a man sexually. You know I'm all about balance.
So, to get to the point, I'm including this song because it doesn't say or insinuate anything unrealistic about how women orgasms, and it does include a celebration of men giving women oral. I have to say I believe celebrations of tongue on clit is something the Orgasm Equality Movement should back. The rest of the lyrics in this song are still sexy but more vague, but he section below really drives it home, I think.
Won't stop girl you know I can't get enoughEnjoy, and I'd love to hear other suggestions for the list.
Wanna taste it in the morning when I'm waking up
Like peach cobbler in my stomach when I eat it up
Got your legs around my neck so I can't get up
See the boys 112 we from the A'
(A' - shorty we don't play)
And when it comes to eating peaches, shorty we don't play
So all the ladies in the house if your peach the shit
Put your hands in the air represent your clique
1.24.2013
Our Kickstarter Party Pics (From a Year Ago)
Charlie and I were looking through some old pictures on the computer - you know, checkin' out the nieces and nephew's b-days and such - and then we saw the pics from our Kickstarter Party from December 17th 2011 - about a year ago. Well, I figured I might as well share a few of them since we're all personal and friendly like on this blog these days.
It was a pretty awesome day actually. For those who weren't around back when we were doing it, let me let you in on what went down. We started a Kickstarter campaign to raise $20,000 for the recording of our score and proper sound finalization for Science, Sex and the Ladies. We hadn't spent anything on the movie up to that point except our own pocket money over the last 10 years, and we really wanted to make sure the sound and music was fabuloso - too many indie movies drop the ball on that. Plus, we had an awesome composer willing to collaborate with us, so we could put all the money into things like professional musicians, recording spaces and top notch audio work. Anyway, my point is, we thought the money could make a huge impact on our movie, but we weren't used to this whole fundraising thing, and I'm gonna be real honest - my stomach was in knots for the whole 30 days. The thing about Kickstarter is that if you don't get enough pledges to meet your goal by the end of the fundraising period, then no one pays and you get no money at all. So, we kinda really, really wanted to make sure we made our goal.
Like I said, the life was slowly being sucked out of me for the whole of the 30 days. To really make it on Kickstarter, you have to work your ass off, advertising, contacting, making good on goal point promises. We started out strong. It got a little slow, and then the last 36 hours, we started getting pledges like crazy. It was enough to make my stomach do back flips out my throat. We had planned a party to start right after the funding period ended, and long story short, we went right up to the last minute, but we made our goal. It was an incredible relief, so the party was a well needed celebration. (BTW, we are only a month or 2 away from the final finished movie with all the music and sound stuff finished!!!). Anyway, here is a quick picture tour of the party.
Our good friends the Fritz's came by early to help decorate and shoot the shit. The Shindig was at the home Barnaby moved into just a couple months before (he had not yet acquired 3 orange cats).
I'm obsessed with colored lights (and it was 8 days before Christmas), so we strung up lights all over the house. Charlie's brother Andrew is delicately placing lights around the food as Barnaby watches (and I can only assume worries about something.)
People were pretty much just standing around checking the status on their phones at the beginning, probably worried we'd be just about 500 dollars short and start begging them to pledge or something (we weren't allowed to pledge on our own campaign). Honestly, that is kind of terrifying, I'm surprised anyone came, really. Below is one of our actors (and my cuz) Tim Stroud and Ms. Stephanie Fritz below that.
That's me, Charlie, and Barnaby huddled around the computer just after we made our goal. What's up now, ya'll!
Let the party begin, party people! As you can see, it was quite civilized.
Me and Barnaby. I want to point out that Barnaby had just shaved down to a disturbingly styled mustache as a reward to our supporters after we got our 100th backer. He also kissed someone and did a break dance routine for other rewards during the campaign. Respect.
Our fine and mysterious actor, Mr. Joshua Ramsey, came by to hang with us for a while. It was quite a privilege to see you, sir, quite a privileged indeed.
Charlie with a tie on over his AnC T-shirt. He was about to fire off a confetti gun in Barnaby's new house. What an asshole. I might have shot some off too.
After lots of friendly conversation, congratulatory hugs, and drunken basement ping-pong, the party was over....just like this damn movie will be soon....finally.
Oh, and here's the Barnaby break dancing video we made as a reward for a supporters...just for fun.
1.17.2013
Bonobos Ladies Get Some Clit Stim
I don't know if you know this, but I'm a big fan of the Bonobos. Also called Pygmy Chimps, these endangered animals, along with regular ol' Chimpanzees, share the honor of being our closest evolutionary relatives. Bonobos are most known for all the sexy times they share together, and if you don't remember hearing about these in school it might be because it's hard to talk about them without also discussing their very sexual culture, so your 8th grade science book may not have included them.
Anyway, I saw this video with Harvard Anthropologist Dr. Richard Wrangham explaining a bit about Bonobos. A note though, the actual visuals of this video are kinda weird. It's actually a phone interview conducted by Dr. Susan Block, and there are strange fade/cuts to her bejeweled hands at random times, and it ends with a sorta blurry psychedelic shot of her rubbing her butt sensually in front of a TV screen playing clips of Bonobos. Don't get me wrong. I enjoy some creative imagery, but I'm just saying it's a bit unexpected. Also, please don't take this as me knocking ol' Dr. Susan Block. She's got a lot of respect for Bonobos - and I got respect for that.
11.21.2012
A Thanksgiving Video Repost
Happy Thanksgiving! I'm re-posting the very special Thanksgiving video that we made last year as part of our Kickstarter campaign (our successful Kickstarter campaign, I might add). I think this video will be an SSL Turkey Day tradition. I mean, it's got pumpkin pie and the word "binner," so it's pretty much the best intersection of Thanksgiving and female sexual response out there.
I'd also like to mention that as I'm writing this, Charlie, Barnaby (my fellow members of AnC Movies and fellow SSL directors), and I are having an AnC meeting, and I asked them to list off some things they are thankful for. Number 1 is clearly gossip, and don't you dare judge us; you know you love gossip. Number 2 is cats (there are 5 between the 3 of us). I guess that pretty much sums up us as a group; shallow, gossip-hungry, and cat obsessed.
Enjoy the video and have a fantastic Thanksgiving day - however you happen to be spending it.
9.23.2012
Celebrating Songs About Laby-bation
Hi there, all! It's the weekend, and I'm not feeling so serious here, so I thought I would simply go for something fun today. As you know, this is a rather pro masturbation blog, and in addition, this blog is keen on particularly championing female masturbation. I mean if we ladies, as a group, are ever going to get to a point where orgasm in a partnered situation comes as naturally to us as it does to men, then we, as a group, need to masturbate more - cause once we realize how easy it is to simply orgasm during masturbation, then we can begin to incorporate that into into the much trickier situation of partnered sex. So, I say we stop feeling so squeamish about it; stop, for those of us who do do it, acting like we don't; and for those of you ladies who haven't tried it out, just start exploring down there. I promise, you'll be glad you started the journey.
On that note - let's celebrate by listening to a couple songs from some fab ladies who were rockin' enough to make songs embracing some ol' jillin' off.
Cindy Lauper is just the coolest, so she goes first. "She Bop." Yes she does indeed Bop. Enjoy.
Next is the classic, "I Touch Myself." It's not so subtle, but why do you need to be, really?
9.14.2012
Laura Berman Gives Bad Orgasm Advice
This, my friends, is a video of Laura Berman giving orgasm advice to a couple (Dash and Kelli). It is stock full of misleading, inaccurate, and frankly, harmful information about the female orgasm. I’m gonna use the word flabbergasted; not at the situation that a popular, mainstream sexpert spit out some shitty info (that’s status quo), but at how popular the sexpert is and how misinformed the sexperting was. I mean Laura Berman is a best selling author of sex advice, she’s a doctor – so she seems credible, plus she was a regular on Oprah and on Dr. Phil. I mean as sexperts go, she’s about as mainstream as one could get. So we can’t just sluff this off as some random YouTube video. This is the status quo. This is the bullshit that is being fed into the minds of a large amount of people; the kind of bullshit that is legitimized by the high profile types of media with which Laura Berman is associated. We should be really...well flabbergasted.
So, in this video Berman advises a couple in which the wife has lost interest in sex. She has been trying to do it once a week, to make her man happy but it's more like every 3 weeks lately. Plus, he's started to turn her down because he knows she's just doing it for him and not really interested. Unsurprisingly, he doesn't find that to be too much fun. Oh - and then we also find out that Kelli can't orgasm with him. She can do it by herself, just not with him.
Berman responds to this in the following way.
Berman: "Only 30% of women reach orgasm during sex, and if they do reach orgasm, it's through other types of stimulation, oral sex, manual stimulation, and so often when that's that case, it's an emotional mental block. Sometimes it's related to messages you got growing up about what nice girls do and don't do.
Kelli: Yeah, absolutely. I was raised Catholic.
Berman: Yeah - so there's some guilt and inhibitions there.So she goes on about that. Then she says...
Berman: The other thing is that I can't tell you how many women have been to OBGYN's and never had their clit looked at or looked at it themselves. Have ya looked? Have you mapped...
Kelli: I feel like mine's...like just from showering in a room with a bunch of girls at massage school...I just feel like mine's all tucked in.
Berman: Right, That's what I'm wondering.
Kelli: ...and some of those girls that are all hangin out. I think they get to have more fun.
Berman: Dash, how's Kelli's clitoris. Does it seem normal?
Dash: Yeah it seems normal, but it's a little hidden.
Berman: Oh okay, does it come out? I mean, does it get bigger with arousal?
Kelli: I don't know.
Berman: Maybe you have a defunct clitoris.
Kelli: I know! I know! That's why I always wanted to come see you, cause I have to figure this out.
Berman: So I think you need a sexual health check-up in that regard.
Okay, from that fantastic exchange, all kinds of genious-ness was insinuated to the watching public.
1. Some poor women have clits that don't work (like those that have trouble coming from sex).
2. There is a "normal" way a clit looks.
3. Most of the women who can't orgasm from sex can't because they have emotional or mental block.
4. It makes sense for a woman to worry about not orgasming from sex.
I call super bullshit on all of this. First off, Kelli can orgasm. She said she could orgasm by herself, so it's highly unlikely that she has a mental block or a defunct clit. And by the way, what the hell is a defunct clit? I think she might have been referring to it not getting erect, like a man who has trouble getting hard, but even if that's the case, not all clits look like they are bigger when aroused. Yes, women get as much blood filling their clit as men get in their penis, but most of the clit is underneath the surface, and you won't see that swell. The vulva lips will swell when aroused, but she was asking about the clit. It's a stupid question for a doctor and sex expert to ask a patient. She should know that the little nub of the clit we see may look exactly the same size as it did before arousal. Berman also asked if the clit looked normal, as if the vulva/clit area of a women all look about the same. I mean that is one of the most diverse areas on the body; size, shape, symmetry, color. That she would expect an answer to that question to be in any way useful is ridiculous. And...to top it off, she didn't correct Kelli after saying she thought the gals with the hangy-out "down-theres" have more fun. Women have long been worried that any orgasm problems they have are due to their anatomy down there; the clit and vagina are too far apart; the clit isn't big enough, you know, things like that. However, scientist have been trying to prove these are issues for a long time but it just doesn't add up. There is not correlation between those types of anatomy differences and a woman's ability to orgasm. Berman really should have set her, and all the viewers, straight about that common misconception.
But back to the fact that Kelli can orgasm. So, Dr. Berman, really? seriously? It's a mental hang-up keeping Kelli from orgasming with Dash? If I say it once, I'll say it a million times, "normal sex" (you might know it as plain ol' intercourse), is great for stimulating the penis, the male organ of sexual pleasure and crap for stimulating the clit, the female organ of sexual pleasure. That is just plain true. I mean, might the problem be that Kelli just isn't getting the stimulation her clit needs during normal sex?
Here's my diagnosis. Kelli, you know how to orgasm. Now, just do that while you are having a sexual interactions with Dash; hell even while you are having sexual intercourse with Dash. Yes, it will be awkward at first because that kind of sexual interaction isn't the kind we usually see in porn, movies, tv, or read about in sexy books, but it is the kind that will allow you both to orgasm.
But, that brings me to the other problem in this video. The whole thing insinuates that women not orgasming from sex is some sort of problem; as if women are just meant to orgasm from nothing more than a man moving his penis in and out of our vaginas. It makes it seem like masturbating with your hand during intercourse or orgasming from other types of sexual interactions are fine maybe, but lesser options; ways to orgasm if the ultimate goal of orgasming from mere penile in vagina stimulation isn't happening. I really think that's how most people feel about it - at least to some degree, but it is crazy to think that. This just isn't a problem. It's just the way it is. The way our bodies are and the way intercourse happens, just doesn't make sense that a female orgasm would occur. The only reason we think it's supposed to is because people and movies and porn and tv all say it should. Putting something in and out of the vagina is simply not a good way to stimulate the female organ of sexual pleasure.
Berman gives really bad advice, people. It is insanely irritating to me to see another example of the sexual status quo reinforcing to women that, because our bodies and our orgasms don't fit nicely into the normal, accepted ideas and expectations of sex, we must be physically broken or incapable - or we are simply not equip mentally and emotionally to get things right when it comes to sex. For once I would love to hear some truly mainstream sexpert say, "Hey ya'll it's not women that are messed up, it's our sexual norms and expectations that are all f'd up." The normal expectations of what happens in a sexual situation could include a variety of things that ensure both partners have orgasms - and intercourse does not have to be one of these.
Stop telling women we need to change. Our bodies work just fine, and our feelings, mental hang-ups, whatever you want to call them, about sex (like when we become uninterested after we've done it for years without having orgasms regularly) make sense within these crap circumstances. Maybe if more ladies had an orgasm every time we got naked and dirty with our partners, the way men usually do, then maybe less men would have to coddle their uninterested partners with romantic presents and candle light dinners in order to spark some interest in allowing a little sexy time. Women and men deserve better sexual lives.
8.28.2012
SNL With Channing Tatum And Some More on Magic Mike
I wrote a SSL review (honorary SSL Review - that is) for Magic Mike HERE, and then soon after I came across another review of Magic Mike. It's on the SPARK blog. (SPARK's a pretty cool organization that, among other things, uses girls themselves to work towards a culture where girls feel empowered to create their own personal, unique, and positive sexuality - and fights media that works against that goal.) I actually did an interview with the director of SPARK a Movement a while back. Check it HERE.
Anyway, I thought the blog had some interesting stuff to say; stuff that wasn't fully addressed in the blog I wrote. I recommend you check it out HERE. The blogger is Jamie Martina, who is working on a documentary about the life and opinions of exotic dancers in the Pittsburgh area, which sounds pretty cool.
On another note, here's just a fun little thing for your viewing pleasure. I figured it's Channing Tatum doing a SNL bit relating to Magic Mike, so it relates, right? Enjoy.
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