Science, Sex and The Ladies available now on IndieFlix

Guess what?
We are super excited that Science Sex and the Ladies is now available streaming on IndieFlix! Founded by Filmmakers, IndieFlix is part champion, part curator. Its a subscription streaming service much like Netflix or Hulu but with only the best of Indie Fare.  Its normally 5 bucks a month or 50 for the year but if you want to support SSL join thru our affiliate links (coupons and discounts baby) and save money at the same time.

1 Month free trial followed by $5/month recurring. Cancel anytime http://indieflix.com/ac/M2_350901/

$35 Annual Membership (that's $15 off ya'll)

Go watch some sweet indie movies!

a coupon for indieflix courtesy of Science Sex and The Ladies
a coupon for indieflix courtesy of Science Sex and The Ladies


Slippery When Wet - The SSL Book Review and the Lube Applicator Insight

Slippery When Wet, One Woman's Journey Through the Mystery of Sex, is a book I came across when the author (Dr. Joanna Ellington or Dr. E) commented on a post I had at BlogHer a couple months ago. Strangely, the name of her blog is Science, Sex & Nature - very similar to this blog and my movie, Science Sex and the Ladies, but it was a complete coincidence. I read the book, and now I'm about to do a proper SSL review - which as you know will focus almost solely on the discussion of orgasm and masturbation. So here goes.

General Overview
The book is a mix of sex and relationship advice with a personal account of the author's sexual life learnings, plus a discussion of her scientific investigations into sperm and her discovery of a fertility friendly lubricant called Pre-Seed. I love hearing candid stories from women about their sexual lives. I think hearing those kinds of stories are important and in this book, they were also a lot of fun. I loved a lot about this book. I recommend giving it a read. It had some SSL positives. You can read about that below. I also, as is my way, had a couple bits of SSL critiques, and those are below too.

I also have something kinda strange to discuss about this book. The thing is, it gave me kind of a mind-blowing insight into a incredibly simple way women could approach getting the kinds of benefits men get from Viagra. It's actually really simple - probably a little too simple - and I don't really even know if the author would see it this way, but I it struck me hard, and I figure it's worth a sort of off-topic discussion at the end of this post.

Dr. Joanna Ellington with her book, Slippery When Wet: One Woman's Journey Through the Mysteries of Sex  from: Dr. E's BlogHer 9.10.2014

SSL Positives in the book

  • She is the mother of all boys and she points out that it was important to the parenting of her children that they not be sexually illiterate, which included these boys knowing where the clitoris was and its importance to the female orgasm. Kudos for that - if you have boys think about doing the same. I'm sure some woman down the line will thank you for at least setting your sons generally in the right direction.
  • She also notes the importance for good education for girls. "Many Teens, including girls themselves, share confusion about female genitalia, such as not understanding the anatomy of the clitoris or mixing and matching the terms vulva and vagina (because socialy we use these terms incorrectly all the time). Additionally most girls aren't taught basic physiology, such as how their bodies lubricate for sex; why overstimulation of the clitoris (by an untaught partner or super tight jeans) can cause pain rather than pleasure; and what will and will not work to trigger an orgasm." Tell it, Dr. E!
  • She speaks to the importance of masturbation as self discovery and acknowledges the problems that occur when girls don't do this. "In contrast, girls often first experience sexual arousal, not by themselves, but rather through physical intimacy with boys, including during intercourse. Because many women do not readily orgasm during penile-vaginal intercourse, girls are much more likely to experience early sexual encounters in which orgasm isn't (*edited: accidentally put is instead of isn't at first*) a natural conclusion to feeling aroused. Additionally, the number of women for whom their first time making love feels good is much lower than that found in men. In one study, 36% of men and 10% of women considered their first intercourse very pleasurable whereas 5% of men versus 33% of women found it to be very unpleasant. Many girls feel embarrassed to admit that they didn't enjoy sex and unsure what they can do to improve their fulfillment and reach orgasm." 
  • She is quite candid and honest about the ups and downs of her sexual life which includes admitting to faking orgasms (cause come on, most of us have). I think this kind of honesty from women is a revolutionary act. The first step to acknowledging that women are not given the opportunity to learn as much about our bodies and to orgasm as much as we deserve to is to be honest to eachother about about our experiences. We need to break down the stigma surrounding that kind of honestly and a book like this helps.
  • Another absolutely fantastic aspect of her book is her discussion about vulvar and vaginal pain. She has dealt first hand with vulvodynia, a chronic pain condition which "caused the relentless burning and irritation I experienced not just right after sex, but also for hours and days afterward. Even walking, sitting down and wearing certain clothes could feel unbearable." She's not alone. The condition affects about 20% of women. Pain down there is not so uncommon at all. In fact, she points out that 46% of women report pain during intercourse at some time in their life, and one in four women suffer at some point from the chronic burning rawness like she had. That's a shit ton of women, but it's not often discussed, and it's not well treated. Doctors aren't always informed, and often don't help much. To me, this issue is incredibly important to the orgasm equality movement, because if your shit hurts, you ain't getting aroused, and you sure ain't going to orgasm. Dr. E gives great advice about what she has learned on the subjects, and I think it could help a lot of women - not only in the learnings she has to offer, but also the sense that other women who are suffering are not alone. 

Some SSL critiques

  • When the author (Dr. E) speaks of her first orgasm, it is during intercourse - her 2nd intercourse experience with this boy. Although she describes that this particular boy was patient and sensual and that their first encounter was not so exciting, she doesn't really talk about what was different with this second situation that made it orgasmic (except maybe that it was in a bed and not with her back uncomfortably against the wooden floor of a boat). I really would like to see more detailed physical information from women to other women when talking about orgasms during intercourse. The advice and personal stories I see now are just way too un-detailed to be helpful about something so uncommonly experienced among women who have sex. It would have been helpful to see more specific descriptions of movement, positions, stimulation techniques, level of arousal, what-parts-were-rubbing-against-what etc. that were happening during intercourse to make one experience end in orgasms and the other not. 
  • She also goes on to say that once she had that orgasm and learned what one felt like, she found several ways to get one, both alone and with a partner. Everything is right with that idea if you ask me, but again, it would have been cool to get some detailed physical descriptions of the experimentation, failures, and successes during the time she discovered these paths to orgasm. Of course, this kind of detail is not right for every book or for every personal story, but I do think it could have fit in well and given a little extra umph to the Dr. E's open and informative style. She's got a blog, though, so there's still time :)
  • I do have to also take quick issue with the discussion about female orgasm helping women choose the best dad; an argument that female orgasm evolved to help women find the best genetic partner with which to create offspring. It's a common and seemingly obvious way to look at lady-gasms, but it's probably not so correct. When it comes to female orgasm and evolution, the most well-researched, logically sound, and comprehensive voice on the topic is Elisabeth Lloyd, who wrote The Case of the Female Orgasm: Bias in the Study of Evolution. Female orgasm just doesn't seem to have a specific evolutionary role. Her book has been unfairly poo-pooed, and people often mix the idea of female orgasm with female arousal when arguing against it, but honestly her argument is so well thought-out and solid that I can't pass up the opportunity to bring it up when I see the subject discussed without recognizing her contribution. So there. I've brought it up. Go read it. I highly recommend it. 

Slightly off topic insight inspired by this book

My sorta mind-blown situation that happened while reading this book came when she was discussing the product she created. She invented a lubricant called Pre-Seed. Being a scientist that focused on sperm (Seriously, she did some cool stuff with that. Here's a Radio Lab interview about a super cool experiment she did that is also discussed in the book), she somehow ended up making a lubricant that created a safe environment for sperm. Bet you didn't know that normal lubricants are not a great environment for sperm, did ya? It's not like spermicide bad - but it's not your best bet for fertility situations. So, if you're looking to conceive and want lube, maybe check into it (not my bag at the moment, but maybe it's yours). It's also reportedly quite mild. In the book, Dr. E says she was very careful about testing all the possible products on her own genitals and threw out anything that bothered her vulvodynia, so if you are also rather sensitive and looking for a less bothersome lube, maybe give it a whirl.

Okay, getting to my mind-blowing part, Pre-Seed comes with applicators to insert the lube up into the vagina. This way it coats all up in there, and bonus, you can put it in place 15 minutes before intimacy. So, I'm reading about this, and I thought, shit, is this kinda approaching the female equivalent to Viagra? I honestly have never heard of applicators for putting in lube. I don't know if I'm just an idiot, or I've just not been listening to the right people, but I don't think that's a common thing people use or talk about...but maybe it should be. Maybe, just maybe a simple thing like adding lube all up in there before sexy times could give most of the benefits to women that men get from Viagra.  Stay with me now. Let's look at the details.

1 Does it make it possible to have intercourse?

Viagra - Yes, its main focus is getting that dick hard, and if the dick's hard it can be inserted into an orifice - which is technically intercourse.

Lube applicator - Yes, mostly. Technically there doesn't need to be lubrication for intercourse, but for god-sake it hurts like a bitch without it, so for all intents and purposes, there does actually need to be lubrication. So let me say (because I - in the name of blog research- tried the ol' shooting-up-lube-into-the-vagina-and-doing-the-intercourse-thing when it was previously bone dry down there) that it made it quite comfortable, in fact, very comfortable to accommodate some penetration. Just adding some lube to the outer parts of the vag lips and/or to the penis simply does not lubricate this whole intercourse situation well - not by a long shot.
The mostly part of "Yes, mostly," arises because there is this other aspect of the vagina and penetration. After a certain amount of arousal, the vagina will elongate to more comfortably accommodate a phallic intruder, and just adding some lube up there doesn't address this aspect of making it possible/comfortable for intercourse, but 1 out of 2 ain't bad.

2 Does it help libido issues?

Viagra - No, it's just a pill to help men overcome some chemical aspects of getting an erection. There still has to be sufficient mental or physical stimulation to begin the arousal process. If you simply aren't into getting it on, it probably won't get your dick hard.

Lube applicator - No, it's just putting some lube up your junk, so no.

3 Does it help get you to the 1st stage of arousal?

Getting increased blood flow to the genitals is the very first thing that happens to both men and women during arousal. For men, that means the penis begins to get hard. For women, increased blood flow means lubrication begins to appear on the vaginal walls.

Viagra - Yeah. However, it's not gonna just give you an erection for no reason. You need to feel kinda aroused to get there, but it helps many men overcome some chemical hurdles, and getting to the point where that first stage of arousal becomes, ya know, obvious, is much easier.

Lube applicator - No, but it basically fakes the first stage of arousal and since the lube is injected up into the vagina (and can be done before sexual encounters begin) it does it in a way that feels very much like what would be happening in natural circumstances.

Difference - So, yeah, just adding some lube in there isn't an internally biological way to help along that first stage of arousal, but it is a super non-risk and non-invasive way to mimic arousal.

4 Can it help with further arousal and orgasm?

Viagra - No, It's all about getting to that erection. The rest is up to you. Without a conducive mental state and appropriate mental and physical stimulation, further arousal or orgasm simply isn't going to happen.

Lube applicator - No. Like I said before, it's just some lube up the lady-junk. The rest is up to you. Without a conducive mental state and appropriate mental and physical stimulation, further arousal or orgasm simply isn't going to happen.

But also yes to both - Okay, so the thing is that Viagra isn't a magic pill and lube's just lube, but something kinda magical about both is that when it helps create that hard dick or those wet lady bits, all the past associations the person and his/her partner have with seeing said erection/wetness, could flood in and make all the shit that's happening feel sexier. Arousal has so much to do with our minds. so, feeling the things in our body (and seeing them in our partner) that remind us of past highly arousing times might do a lot to improve our arousal, which, of course, improves our chance for an orgasm. So in that way, using Viagra or a lube applicator could help towards greater arousal and orgasm in similar ways.

Neither are magic bullets, but they both maybe are a step in the right direction...and even if the lube applicator doesn't quite hold up to the power of Viagra, it's not too far off. Plus the lube applicator situation is non-prescription, easy to try out, and there aren't any real serious health risks, It's something to think about.

***Full SSL style discussion would have me remind you that women often lack the proper physical stimulation for arousal and orgasm (i.e. - too much vaginal stimulation and not enough clitoral stimulation), so if you are looking for ways to help with arousal, orgasm or libido, make sure that the sexual encounters you do have are full of the types of erotic touches that actually do arouse you...I mean, first things first. I also want to point out that intercourse isn't everything, and a little lube up the hoo-hoo could also be nice for things like manual stimulation, oral stimulation, and some good ol' grinding on eachother's bodies, so don't be forgetting about those things.


Madelyn Ritrosky - LIKDIT!

So I do this slightly-different-for-the-SSL-blog series called "Ladies I Know Doing Interesting Things!" or "LIKDIT!" It's pronounced "liked it!" with a clear exclamation point at the end. Each LIKDIT! post will be exactly as you might expect - it's about a woman I know personally (even if it's just an acquaintance) who is out there doing or making something - taking risks, ya know. I'd like to point out, though, that almost every woman in my life (that I like) is doing something that I find courageous, or difficult, or adventurous, or truly kind. I think any interesting person dabbles in this kind of stuff from time to time. The LIKDIT! gals just happen to be doing that stuff outside of their work or family life and in a bit more public way - with a creative or philanthropic edge.

So here we go. I first met Madelyn Ritrosky when she contacted me about showing SSL at a Reproductive Rights Task Force in a nearby town. At the time, our final sound and score was not finished, but after talking we decided to use her group as our first test screening. She was super nice and awesome at helping us organize it. We got to talk afterward and I found out she was writing a book called Stardust&Moonbeams which involved some young couples in the 20's and some feminist ideology. I got to read a draft of it, and I really appreciated how she was exploring the female gaze - the female eye looking at the male body, which is unfortunately too under explored in our world. Even the fantastic female gaze magazine Filament isn't being made anymore :(.

Madelyn Ritrosky - write/producer Stardust&Moonbeams

Well, turns out, she is in the midst of turning a section of the book (one particularly focused on the female gaze) into a short movie, and I'm excited to see how they go about it. She's got a team of women to make the damn thing and some great actors on board, and now, they just need some funds. You know me - I love looking at hot men, seeing feminist ideals in movies, and supporting local movie makers. If you are so inclined go help fund this project, go HERE and do it. Why? Well, here's a few things the Stardust&Moonbeams crew had to say about it:
  • This is entirely about positive, equitable, empowering sexual dynamics between women and men
  • 99% of the media is a "male gaze" turned on women – we're tired of that and want a "female gaze" turned on men; you'll not only see it, you'll hear about it at a cocktail party, inviting you to question what you usually see in the media
  • There's a huge audience out there for this, and we expect a great festival run. Contributors say, "It's about time!" and "Filmmaking needs this."
  • Women ARE the filmmaking team, which is really rare
Thanks Madelyn for caring about the female gaze and for getting out there and following your passion!


Dear Mary Carey: You're Awesome, But I Didn't Realize That When I Put You in My Movie

Dear Mary Carey

I'm writing this to you because I used a small clip of you from the movie Mary Carey AKA Living Legend in my documentary, Science, Sex and the LadiesI want to write all the actresses in clips I have used, and so here we are. You are my second letter blog (I previously wrote Kim Cattrall HERE).

Mary Carey (PacificCoastNews.com)

The clips (and there actually aren't that many) in the movie are all used as examples of how media depictions of orgasm and sex fail women. I feel it's important for me to let each of you know why I chose something you were in, and let you know that my criticism of the clip is not also a criticism of you as a person or even your choices as an actress. I said the same thing to Kim Cattrall, and I'll continue saying it because it's true. All of us are just women living in a culture that is way more confusing when it comes to our orgasms than it should be, and you are all women working in industries that I imagine are a lot harder for women than for men. I don't have any qualms about critiquing the culture that has made the clips, but honestly, I do feel bad if these criticisms make particular women feel targeted or shamed. I do not want that. I don't think it is useful, and most importantly, I don't think it is deserved, My greatest hope is that your image in Science, Sex and the Ladies will spark you to become part of the conversation that this movie creates and not a target of that conversation, and I invite you to add your 2 cents in however you'd like.

So, Ms. Carey, the scene that I used of you is set before a similar scene in a mainstream TV Show (it's Samantha riding a hot farmer, cowgirl style in a Sex and the City clip) and a scene we created that depicts a similar situation happening in a private home between an everyday hetero couple. It is meant to show how porn influences mainstream media and mainstream media influences what goes on in our bedrooms. In your clip, you are riding a guy, cowgirl style, on a bed. I chose that clip simply because it looked like very normal porn. It was quite vanilla as porn goes, so I didn't feel I was misrepresenting what is commonly available in pornography.

All 3 scenes (the porn, the TV, and the "homemade" clips) show a woman, quite vocally, having an orgasm during intercourse while sitting straight upward "cowgirl style" on a man who is lying flat on his back (You can see the SITC scene HERE. It's YouTube age restricted and the part I use starts at about 2:26). There is clearly no stimulation of the clitoris happening during these orgasms - either from a hand or from friction against the partner's body. These scenes all show a woman orgasming from nothing more than a penis rubbing the inside of her vagina...and an orgasm caused only from that is something that simply doesn't exist in scientific research. It seems impossible, but orgasms caused by stimulation of the inside of the vagina have never been recorded, described, and observed in scientific literature. If these types of orgasms exist, we have only heard tell of them and never validated their existence. As a culture, we know that only about 1/3 of women claim to have these types of "vaginal" orgasms, but we are somehow okay with letting our porn and other media depict that rare type of orgasm almost every time an orgasm is depicted. Plus, these "vaginal" orgasms are probably even more rare than we already imagine they are. Seriously - I explain that more HERE.

So, the movie I made, Science, Sex and Ladies, is definitely critical of the fact that porn, more often than not, shows women orgasming from the ol' in and out alone. It is critical because it's unrealistic, and it gives women and men a bad education about how ladies achieve orgasm. The movie is not, however, critical of porn as a thing. In fact, we were trying to get across that porn is important to our sexual culture and that porn could be incredibly influential in changing our cultural understanding of female orgasm for the better. One of my greatest hopes is that Science, Sex and the Ladies could help start more conversation among the women of porn about the realism of female orgasm in pornography. I know there are lots of issues that affect what is in mainstream porn, but my feeling is that women have been gaining more and more influence in the industry, and they want porn to be the best it can be. I got obsessed with listening to Vivid radio during a time I got it free with my new(ish) car, and I found the women on there to be so interesting, smart, thoughtful, and funny (I talk more about that HERE), and it made me feel very hopeful. In fact I heard you on there a lot and loved it. You actually said some things that made me really excited and interested to talk with you.

The first one I heard on May 17, 2014. Your guest was Nadia Styles, and you were doing a thing that I think you called "truth or truth." Anyway, you asked whether she'd ever faked it, and she said something like, "I can't lie. Yes." Then you said something like, "Sometimes you just want to get it over with," and she said she'd actually done that a lot unfortunately. You both laughed about it and continued the "truth or truth." It was funny and true and what I loved was your honesty about something most women (and I'd assume especially porn stars) don't want to admit in public. I also liked the way you made it easy for your guest to be honest. To me it's a revolutionary and very feminist act to speak honestly about aspects of the female experience that are widely shared, but that can feel like personal failures. I thought it was awesome.

The second one I heard on July 1, 2014. Your guest was Lucky Starr. The fabulous Debi Diamond was in the booth and in on the conversation. The conversation went to positions that would allow you to come, and you said you liked to be on top because you could come from the grinding that way. You said you needed something in the vagina and on the clit. (At this point Debi said she could come 4 different ways and then explained those. I will go into that in a whole other post, but I'll just say it was interesting, and I would love to talk with her about that because I think she and I are actually on the same page. We are just using different vocabularies....but I'll get to that another time). Debi said you were sheltered, but you were pretty clear about always needing some clit stimulation to orgasm, and then I think the conversation went to Hitachi wands from there. Anyway, I saw that as another super brave thing you did. Admitting that you don't orgasm just from a dude banging you is not a simple or easy thing to do. I don't think most women want to admit that to their partners or themselves, much less a huge listening audience. I also don't think it's uncommon to get comments like Debi Diamond gave you when that sort of thing is admitted. I think women can easily feel that they are not living up to their full sexual potential if they must have some clitoral stimulation to orgasm, and that is unfortunate because women do need clitoral stimulation to orgasm just as men need penile stimulation. It's not strange. Our society just makes it feel strange.

Anyway, my point is, I didn't know much about you when I chose the clip, but now that I have heard you on the radio, I couldn't think of a better person to have chosen. I really think you might connect with this movie, and I'd really love for you to see it. I want to get a copy to you, so I'll be trying to get a hold of you to do just that.

I think you are kinda badass, and I hope you feel that the movie I made about the ol' lady-gasm is fair and interesting, and I hope what I'm saying about porn in it is clear and not offensive. There's a lot of thoughtless and kinda mean stuff being said about porn, and that's not what I want to be a part of. I want to hear your thoughts, though, so please send them my way.

All the best to you,



Bex vanKoot Spits the Truth about Orgasm Equality at RAW Magazine!!!!!

Ah, Bex - I met her a couple years ago through this blog. She left a comment on one of my posts, and every now and again we make some quick email or comment contact. Recently she sent me a link (it's the article Ecstatic Science and the Erotic Brain in the September 2104 RAW Attraction Magazine HERE) to something she wrote, and basically, I love the hell out of it. She sent it to me because she said although she didn't particularly cite anything from this blog or the movie, the SSL ideas were part of what led her to write it. (She does list THIS blog post and the SSL movie as a reference in the article, which I was kinda super stoked about - I mean, it was SSL's first reference, and it's kinda awesome.)

Bex, the revolution building, free-lance, sex positive writer at your service!

Anyway, what she wrote is so on point, and it was everything I would want to say but better. It was a simple and thoughtful piece on the too few female orgasms in our world and what to do about it. It was also a poignant piece about language mattering. The following is one of the last things she says:

Most importantly, call an orgasm an orgasm. And call all the other awesome, sensual, erotic and ecstatic experiences you have by some other name. Cumming, gushing, climaxing, reaching it... If you need to call it anything at all, call it what it is. In an ideal world, maybe it wouldn't matter what words we use to describe the hot fun we're all having. But in this reality, most women are not getting the good times they deserve. And you do deserve it! t's time to demand what's yours.

This article is such good revolutionary work. READ IT. Plus, it just really excited me. Bex is a freelance writer, a sex-positive advocate, and she's also a spirit and energy worker and a practitioner of tantric yoga. She's got street cred among a population of people that I don't, a population of people that are very much interested in thinking about, talking about, and exploring the spiritual aspects of sexuality. The way I write about this orgasm equality stuff does a lot of things, but it doesn't engage much with the spiritual aspect of sexuality. It's just not my style. Honestly, that is a criticism that this blog and this movie get....that they ignore the spiritual aspect of sex, and I think it turns some people off enough that they disengage with the message or become somewhat hostile to it. In the same way, some people just hear a word like tantric or ecstatic and are turned off.  The truth is, how a message is conveyed and who conveys it is as important as the message itself, and I don't always convey it in a way that everyone likes. Bex conveys Orgasm Equality messages in a subtly different way - a way I think could reach people I cannot, and that is so, so exciting.

Seriously though, her article speaks the truth, and points out that so much of the bickering among well meaning people about female orgasm comes down to language...It's unfortunate, and we really all could come together more. Bex and I are starting a Language Revolution on the Orgasm Equality Front. Who's with us?!

Go read the article. Bex is a real writer and says stuff good the way I can't and stuff. Go HERE and click on the Ecstatic Science and the Erotic Brain article to get the PDF.


Our Indy Premiere, A Good Review, SSL Streaming, and Masculinity/Femininity Movie

Three things today.

1. The Indianapolis Premiere of Science, Sex and the Ladies was about as awesome as I could have hoped for. Although Indy is our hometown, and it's good to be on home turf as far as turnout goes, we already had the cast and crew screening way back in February, and people had been having small private shows (our small screenings) around town for months. So, most of our core audience had seen the movie, and frankly you never know if you can bring people out to a movie more than once. However, we had a kick-ass turnout. Over 200 people. We packed the house, and I honestly didn't know over half the people there - at all, which was super duper awesome. We got great feedback too, and even scheduled some more small screening from people there who wanted to show friends and family - gotta love that.

Only 1 couple left during the movie out of, well, being appalled - at least as far as we can tell. I saw them leave, and then I heard later from someone sitting next to them that the guy started kinda freaking out a little when the vulvas came on screen, and then both the guy and gal started looking really uncomfortable, and then they left not too far into it. I say those are good leaving-in-an-appalled-huff numbers for an event that had 6 foot vulvas on the screen. The only other bad thing that happened was I drank the wrong beer from Scarlet Lane all night.

2. SSL is streaming for free until the end of the date November, 14th 2014! You can get to it through a really great review of SSL that was done on the blog Science, Sex & Nature. The woman (also the author of that Slippery When Wet book I mentioned in the last post), who wrote it asked if she could give her readers access to it for a short time, and it coincided with the Indy Premiere, so we said sure. We thought that along with reaching her readers, it'd be a nice thing to do as a thank you for all the support we got from the people here in Indy...and you non-Indy readers get the benefit too. So, check out the review and get a look at Science, Sex and the Ladies HERE.

3. I saw a movie called Masculinity/Femininity at the 2014 Indianapolis LGBT Film Festival today, and I thought it was worth a quick shout out. It's an experimental documentary, and it's investigating (you might have guessed) masculinity and femininity - thus the name of the film. The styling of this movie is not everybody's cup of tea, but it's the kind of thing I like to see at a film festival - something unique that takes liberties a lot of other movies don't or won't. I mean, I think the best thing about a film fest is the chance to see what's happening in parts of the film community that I can't access in the regular ol' theaters or on Netflix. So, I'm glad I saw this, and I think there were some interesting contemplations on gender. If you are into avante garde movies or into thinking more deeply about masculinity and femininity, check this movie out. Here's their Facebook page so you can keep up with where it shows next.

SSL Bonus? One of the people interviewed was Sophia Wallace, the artist who created Cliteracy, and you know I think the Cliteracy campaign is for real on point. Also, one woman (and forgive me for not remembering - I didn't have my notebook with me to take notes) speaks about how she was taught as a teen that not having sex with boys was absolutely imperative to making it in the world - and that sex=babies=fucked up your life. It matches the cultural predicament discussed in the book Dilemmas of Desire by Deborah Tolman (a fantastic book we discuss in Science, Sex and the Ladies - I highly recommend it), about girls having more struggles with their desire because they often feel that since they (and not boys) have to be the ones to stop sexual encounters before they get to the baby-making stages, then they have to suppress their desire in various ways so they don't let themselves get out of control and ruin their lives before they begin. Point is there are definitely some intersections between this movie and SSL.


Slippery When Wet, Free Kindle Download!

 Today is the day of the Science, Sex, and the Ladies Indianapolis premiere, and that's obviously super exciting, but I just got an email about something else pretty exciting... And free.

The book Slippery When Wet: One Woman's Journey Through the Mystery of Sex is doing a free Kindle download event, today and tomorrow (Nov. 6 and 7, 2014).

Check it out. I met the author, Dr. Joanna Ellington, online after she left a comment on one of my Blogher posts. She's a scientist specializing in sperm, and did some really cool work (including something I had previously heard her discuss on NPR's Radio Lab). She also invented a fertility friendly lubricant called Pre-Seed. We email hit it off, and she watched SSL (and will be doing a post on it soon), and I am like 85% done with her book now, and will be writing something about it soon too.

What I can say about it now, very quickly, is that there is a lot of good info in the book about some things we often don't have much good info on - like about vaginal and vulva pain that all too many women experience and endure silently (which is important to the Orgasm Equality Movement because it affects a woman's ability to get aroused, which affects the ability to orgasm). Plus, it's just an interesting and very real look into a woman's sexual life.

Anyway, check out this book. http://amzn.com/


Thursday, Nov. 6, 2014 - SSL Indy Premiere!!!!

I'm kinda busy, and although I have a bunch of blog post ideas (super substantial ones, people) I really want to do, I haven't had enough time to sit and really get to them. So, I'm going to write about something quickly...the upcoming Indianapolis Premiere of Science, Sex and the Ladies (Thursday, Nov. 6, 2014 doors 6:30 movie 7:30). This premiere thing is one of the reasons I haven't had much time lately, so it seems appropriate.

Anyway, I've been a-hustlin' trying to get the word out, and it's been going pretty well. I think it's going to be a good crowd. I have to give my sister big props on that. She's a monster advertiser me, and I love that silly bitch for it. She's ride or die all the way. Seriously, it's really cool to have people around that support me like this. I love you Mel, and I love all those other ab fab friends and cast members who are hard core repping for this movie out there. It's pretty awesome.

I'm getting excited, and if any of you out there are from Indy or have Indy friends, I'd love to see you or your lovely pals. We'll have some good brews there from Scarlet Lane Brewery. We picked the Brewery because it's in McCordsville, where we all at AnC went to high school (well, the school is technically in Fortville, but they're pretty much the same town), and because there's a woman brewing there, which is not as common as it should be...and because the beer is really good. I had a cinnamon sugar beer that tasted like some bad ass cinnamon toast. It was buttery and everything. It was a dark beer through, and I know not everyone is into them, but if you are...

Point is - I'm excited about Thursday, and If you are around, come out to the show. Tickets are only $6 bucks. Get em' HERE.