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Showing posts with label SSL Philosophy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label SSL Philosophy. Show all posts
4.04.2017
Retro SSL Post: Replying To Comments And Thinking On The Discrepancies Around 'Vaginal Orgasm'
Here's an SSL Post from a couple years back. It has some good links to other posts, so I thought it'd be a good one to put up again. Promise I'll have some new posts soon.
My critiques of a BBC article called, "The Mystery of the Female Orgasm," was posted on Alternet and Salon this week, and that means I got all kinds of comments. And, you know me, I like to engage in those comments as much as I can. It's actually incredibly time-consuming, but I also see it as really important because:
1. I'm just a nobody saying things lots of people don't want to hear and don't see why they should care about, so it's not like I have tons of chances to put my point of view out there for large amounts of people to hear, so I need to take the chance when I get it.
2. It helps me understand what other people hear when they read my writing on this stuff. If people are not getting what I'm saying, then I could be saying it better, and I should adjust.
3. It helps ground me a little bit in reality. I need to always be checking to understand what people are telling me and really consider how that fits into the things I'm saying. Do I need to adjust? Do I need to pull back? Am I overstepping my competence? Are there things that I haven't fully thought through but need to in order to get my point across better?
I don't get that kind of schooling talking to my friends. Honestly, I used to be a nervous wreck when something I wrote got posted somewhere that got lots of comments. My stomach would churn. I would spend excessive amounts of time obsessing over every little reply. I certainly have received lots of fantastic comments in my life, but as you can imagine, the internet comment world can be a nasty place. Contrary commentors are louder and more ready to pounce. Plus the negative stuff just sticks with you more.
Anyway, I am happy to say that I don't get bothered at all anymore. Besides just simply the time it takes to do it all, I don't feel overly obsessive, or annoyed, or insane, or bothered. I really don't - seriously, say any shitty thing you want to say about me or my points - I won't bat an eye. And honestly, I find if I try replying as nicely as possible to people, almost everyone will soften up a bit and engage in more useful conversation. The internet makes people act harsher than they actually are, and I find most people are really quite nice. I actually kind of like it now.
I do hear pretty much the same basic contrary comments every time I write on the topic, so I have had a lot of experience with talking about them. I honestly don't get comments that surprise me - which might be part of the reason it doesn't bother me as much anymore, but all that being true, I still feel like fielding comments is a challenging and useful endeavor. And actually this last round made me feel like I should think about more succinct, relate-able, and thoughtful ways of speaking about the discrepancy between what scientific inquiry has indicated about vaginal orgasm and the fact that some women claim to experience vaginal orgasm. What do I want to say and what can I reasonably say about how this reality should be interpreted for individual women and their partners? What do I want to say about the language we use in this situation? Should I / can I be more speculative about reasons this discrepancy exists? How do I succinctly say what I want to say about why, even with any harm that may come of it, this real discrepancy should be widely understood and thoughtfully discussed.
Anyway, my point it that those are things I'm thinking about now, but a post on that is not a quick post like this one is. I have real, paying work that is taking precedence right now, so I just wanted to give a quick nod to the people over the past week on different forums who inspired my deeper thinking. I have definitely talked in different ways about this topic before, and I went back through some blogs and linked some below that touched on it, but like I said, I need to write something more succinct and clear and all those kinds of things. For now, this will have to do.
Thanks all you commentors out there. I really do appreciate the engagement.
Some past posts on the general topic....
HERE is a post that includes Science, Sex and the Ladies' (the movie not the blog) press kit answers about if we are really saying the vaginal orgasm doesn't exist and if we are calling women liars. This one says things I say all the time. However, I think it focuses a bit more on the simple fact that there is a discrepancy with what science has shown and what women who claim vaginal/g-spot/inner orgasm are claiming, and that it's actually not such a crazy thing to wonder whether some of that discrepancy can be explained because some women say they orgasm this way when they actually do not.
HERE is a post of me ranting (a little, not toooo much) about cries that the vaginal orgasm is picked on too much. Spoiler alert: It's kinda like calling reverse racism...it just doesn't quite fly.
HERE is a post that talks about 1. People telling me the subject's not a useful thing to talk about since all orgasms (even vaginally stimulated one) are clitoral anyway and 2. that I'm an asshole for telling women their vaginal orgasms aren't real. I talk in this post, as I often do, about how important the accurate information is that I'm putting out there, and that it's worth putting out there even though it might be hard to face. However, I also go a little bit into how complicated our culture is around female orgasm and how we should at least be considering the possibility that women might be dealing with that complication in ways that aren't normally considered.
HERE is a post of me talking personally about how hard it has been over the years to say things about vaginal orgasm that I know piss people off. I also talk a little about my own experiences and the possibility that smart, sexual women might be able to convince themselves that they orgasm vaginally when they actually don't.
HERE is a post about how dismissive comments often are - ignoring that the argument that there is a large, encompassing, cultural problem and blaming the problems about lack of female orgasm on intimate partner communication instead.
HERE is a post about the comment I often get telling me that talking about orgasm in a physical way is, like, not cool, man - because love and other pleasures shouldn't be taken out of it. It's a little off topic, but I think it relates.
2.21.2017
Vintage SSL: Pleasure and "Choosing" to Have an Orgasm
***Here's a blog post I wrote back in February of 2011. i thought is was worth a little dusting off and reposting. I changed it's wording a bit in a few places, but it's the same sentiment. enjoy the blast from the past.***
This article got me thinking
I read this post on BlogHer entitled "The Orgasm Gap: Are Women Faking It?" It and the comments for it, started me thinking more about the words "pleasure" and "choice." These are common words used in discussions about the female orgasm, and I think they are often used sloppily. But to get into that, let's first answer the question posed...do women fake? Of course the answer is yes. Lots of women fake it. The author points to a study of about 6000 people where 85% of men claim their woman climaxed in their last encounter and only 64% of women claimed that they orgasmed in their last encounter. This discrepancy is nothing new. One could find a number of surveys showing that there is a chunk of women out there faking orgasms. Since men don't seem to fake nearly as much as ladies do, she wonders if women are just too used to pleasing without return or too tired with work, kids, and home to make the time for getting turned on. (Maybe faking quick helps you get more shut-eye without feeling like you are always saying no to sex). Then she goes on to wonder the following:
Or could it be something even deeper. Right now, I’m on a book tour for my new book, What’s Up Down There? Questions You’d Only Ask Your Gynecologist If She Was Your Best Friend Just today alone, I got these questions:
- What does an orgasm feel like?
- How do I know if I’ve had an orgasm?
- My boyfriend is bummed if I don’t look like I’m having fun, but sex hurts me. What should I do?
What this tells me is that many of us honestly don’t know what gives us pleasure. Many of us don’t even know what an orgasm IS!
- I don’t really know what I like in bed. How can I find out?
Pleasure is one thing, but let's not confuse that with orgasm here
I think she's oh so right. Although I would make a small distinction. I think it is not pleasure that women are uncertain about. I think it is the orgasm in particular. Pleasure is easy, and we understand pleasure. We eat for pleasure, talk for pleasure, read for pleasure. We ladies really can tell if we like something or we don't - and that is no different in sex. We can find pleasure in all sorts of sexual activity; the sensation of kissing, the emotional closeness, the intensity of rough touching, the high of risking someone catching you, the freeing feeling of being naked, the calming nature of romantic candles and scented oil, even the pleasure of having sex without someone trying to make you have an orgasm you feel you'll never have...I could go on forever. In our notion of what is pleasurable, we as people can be diversely unique. And sometimes, those unique personal pleasures can also cause physical sexual arousal or orgasm.
Ways of experiencing pleasure are as diverse as we are. Ways of experiencing orgasm are not nearly as diverse.
The orgasm, however, that could result from the pleasure and physical arousal is not so diverse. It is not so diverse because the female orgasm is a specific physical reaction that results from clitoral stimulation (however that stimulation happens to come about). This is in the same way that male orgasms are a specific physical reaction that results from penile stimulation. Although women's orgasms are often discussed as if they are more diverse, unique and mysterious, there is no good scientific reason to believe that. Lady-gasms are only as unique, diverse, and mysterious as male orgasms - which means they ain't that big of a mystery.
But lady-gasms are harder to figure out given how our culture teaches, discusses, and depicts them
The thing is; how to physically have an orgasm is are not so obvious for us ladies as it is more the gentlemen because we are constantly misled about how we should attain orgasm. The depictions of women orgasming that we see, the advice we get, the discussions that take place, the jokes that are said, the sexual education we receive in school, and the types of sex that are considered normal all point to women's orgasms resulting from vaginal stimulation through intercourse. Yet, there is simply no good scientific evidence that this is ever the case. Although there may be a woman out there who can have an actual physical orgasm through vaginal stimulation alone, she has not yet been recorded as doing so. The scientifically recorded orgasms out there come from clitoral stimulation - indirect or direct. That's just the truth, and that disconnect between how women actually orgasm and how everyone seems to think we orgasm makes real-life attaining of lady-gasms more problematic than dude-gasms.
Which brings us back to pleasure vs. orgasm
So, we need to make a distinction when we talk about "pleasure" because due to all the confusion/misinformation around how women physically orgasm, "pleasure" is too often used as interchangeable with "orgasm" when it comes to women. We aren't confused as a culture about how men physically orgasm, so there is not the same problems with inappropriately mixing the use of "pleasure" vs. "orgasm."
The truth is, when sexperts say, as they often do, that achieving pleasure in sex can be done in a large variety of ways that are vastly unique to each woman (anal, vaginal, clitoral, backrubs, fantasizing, etc. I've heard much crazier - believe me), it is essentially saying orgasm can be achieved in a variety of ways - and that is just plain not true. Not making the appropriate and fact-based distinctions between what can cause orgasm and what can cause pleasure continues to perpetuate the myth that female orgasm is fickle, mysterious and deeply varied from one woman to the next - and confuses the fuck out of women trying to figure out how they might have orgasms in their own sexual experiences.
So, take for instance the most common of things 2 heteros do when they are having a sexual interaction - vaginal intercourse. Yes, it may be quite pleasurable to a woman, but that doesn't mean it is orgasmic. This is important. The ways of attaining pleasure can be as unique as the people themselves, and men and women can both find all kinds of pleasure in sex, but the ability to orgasm during vaginal intercourse is way skewed towards men. Basic ol' PinV sex is PERFECT for penile stimulation and not great at all for clitoral stimulation, so the hard truth is that men, way more often than women, also often get an orgasm along with that pleasure.
Why is it that female sexual pleasure is so equated with female orgasm?
We as a culture know that women don't orgasm as much as men, and thinking (as incorrect as it may be) that the female orgasm is more fickle and mysterious than a man's is an easy way to sweep that blatant and unnecessary inequality under the rug. But another way to do that is to assume men naturally just care more about orgasm, and women just naturally have less inclination to care about orgasm. If we believe we ladies are just as satisfied to have pleasure during sex as we are to have orgasms during sex, than everyone's off the hook for actually putting effort into making sure women have orgasms the way we do for men. And indeed, this is often the story we tell ourselves. In fact, the comments added to the post I wrote about above show plenty of women saying that they aren't worried about orgasms too much; saying there is plenty of other things to enjoy about sex; that we're all just too damn obsessed with women orgasming; that they have never orgasmed and don't see why it's such a big deal; that they enjoy sex just fine without one...that pleasure during sex is just as good as pleasure and an orgasm. In a way these women are right, because there is a lot to enjoy about sex besides the big O.
Do we really choose pleasure of orgasm, though?
However, this isn't just a matter of women choosing to either have an orgasm during their sexual encounter or not. It's not as if when women get down and dirty in that one-night stand or the midnight sex with their husband, they get to a point and say, "You know, I'm going to not have an orgasm. I haven't just sat back and really enjoyed the feeling of a naked body against me or reveled in the pride of giving a man pleasure without asking for anything in return in a while."
I mean, that is a valid choice in a sex act, and one that maybe men should feel is more legitimately available to them, but this is not what is happening for most women. Women are lacking orgasms largely for a simple reason - because they don't know how to with a partner. Women and men are both led to believe that orgasm should happen for women through intercourse, and that intercourse is the ultimate in sexual contact, yet that is not how women orgasm - except in porn, movies, tv, comics, jokes, etc... Women need the appropriate amount and type of sustained outer clitoral stimulation and men need the same on their penis. Problem is, status quo sex and our basic cultural knowledge of sex makes that easy for men and an uphill battle for women - if either of them even knows which hill to battle up. So, to speak about women's orgasm as if it is a choice whether to have one or not is bothersome to me.
Once we get to a situation where we have a generation who grows up understanding how males and females physically orgasm, and who sees depictions and discussions of sex accurately portraying the actions involved in both male and female orgasm during partnered sex - then I will concede that whether to have an orgasm during a sexual interaction is a choice. It is not a choice for most women*, and focusing on the other pleasures of sex is really their only choice. While acknowledging that women can enjoy and find pleasure in sex without orgasm, we should also be working to make the choice to have or not to have an orgasm an actual viable choice for women - the way it is for men.
*Thanks to some constructive criticism, I'd like to point out "most" refers to the approximately 2/3 of women who claim they do not have orgasms always or most of the time they have sex. This is a pretty consistent finding, but specifically can be found in the 1976 book The Hite Report on Female Sexuality by Shere Hite. Besides her own survey, she documents at least 3 others that are consistent with her own.
Labels:
faking,
Orgasm,
SSL Philosophy,
vintage
8.03.2016
Vintage SSL - The Alternative Universe Orgasm
I decided to do something I haven't done on this blog before - put up an old post like it's new. It sounds nicer if I call it vintage, so that's what I'm calling it. This post was originally written on January 11th 2011, so it's had 5 years to ripen. I did make a couple small fixes to read better, but that's it. It's one of my faves. Enjoy.
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| From Sophia Wallace's 'Cliteracy, 101 Natural Laws' She's awesome. Check her out. |
The Alternative Universe
Okay....Imagine, if you will, an alternate universe....Mostly things are the same except people extract eggs and sperm to make babies and thus think about sex a bit differently. Of all the sexual possibilities, what our current universe calls 'sex' is intercourse. In this new and exciting alternate universe, when people say 'sex', they mean that the woman's clitoris is grinded on the base of the penis (where it connects to the balls) - until orgasm. This is the general definition of sex in this alternate universe. But, grinding the clit onto the lower pelvis where it meets the penis or on the inner thigh close to where it meets the penis would also be considered sex - just different positions. Oral sex, manual stimulation, and intercourse all also exist, but are not the common type of "real sex" that is depicted and discussed so commonly in movies, TV, books, porn, and songs.
Alternative Universe Sex Culture
Okay, so in this universe a few things are common knowledge:
- Women average 3 to 7 minutes to reach orgasm. Men average about 25 minutes.
- Only about 20 - 30% of men on surveys claim to orgasm from sex alone. 10% of men have never experienced an orgasm.
- Men on average watch porn less often, masturbate less, have fewer sexual fantasies, are less interested in one night stands, and generally have a lower sex drive
- Men tend to need more romance and emotional connections to feel aroused and satisfied during a sexual encounter
However, these books also go on about the different positions that could make sex more pleasurable for him. For instance, if he's on top and she's rubbing against the base of his penis where it meets his leg, and at a particular angle, the penis is in a position to get more stimulation against her navel. Yay for him! Oh and by the way, what's great about that position is that it not only gives him some penile stimulation, but he can also put pressure on the inner base of the penis. Most people believe that the inner base of the penis (the part that extends inside the body a bit) is the "K-spot." The idea is that the K-spot allows a deeper caressing of the penis that accounts for a deeper, more full bodied orgasm than the penile orgasm does. It is, of course, not an orgasm that all men seem to be able to achieve, although there's not much research on the subject. Most advice books will tell you that the majority of men need penile stimulation in order to orgasm, even as they sing the praises of k-spot stimulating sex positions.
Alternative Universe Scientific Sex Knowledge
Strangely though, if you really look into the research of this culture you would find that when men masturbate they can orgasm as fast, easily, and reliably as women, and the way men masturbate doesn't look a lot like how they have sex. Also, there has been no scientifically and physically verified cases of a male orgasm through "k-spot" stimulation, even though it seems like there are plenty of men - in porn and movies and stuff like that - that have them all the time.
Flippin' That Script
If you think this alternate universe seems kinda blind and clueless, well.....we should probably look in the mirror. 'Cause we be treatin' the clit like the this alternative universe treats the penis. It's some BS. #Cliteracy #IMadeAWholeMovieAboutThis #SexSoMale
Labels:
clit,
Clitoris,
Orgasm,
SSL Philosophy
3.12.2016
Columbus, OH: I'll see you at the Gateway Film Center!!!
Come See a Real Live Showing of SSL!!!!
Hello my fabulous readership! I want to meet you. All of you!
Well, that is true, but really just those of you that live in the general Ohio area - Columbus, Ohio area to be more precise.
I'm excited to say that Science, Sex and the Ladies was asked to be part of The Gateway Film Center's Documentary Week. It will be playing on Wednesday, April 6th at 7:30pm, and guess who will be there for the ol' Q and A. That's right, me and my crew. Me, Charlie and Barnaby, the directing trio of SSL, will be answering all your most deeply held questions about the movie and subjects related to the movie.
Seriously though, I really would love to meet people. We'll be staying the night, so we'll probably go have a beer after the show and all that. Hit me up at anc att ancmovies dottt com, tweet me, post something on the AnC FB page if you'll be there or you have a good suggestion about where to get beer afterward or whatever.
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| Gateway Film Center Documentary Week March 31st - April 7th 2016 |
Or Let Others Know About It!
And if you can't be there, or even if you can, or if you know anyone in Columbus, please do a sister a solid and social media this shit, or just tell your Columbus friends directly about it, or however you choose, but please help me spread the word. It would mean a lot.
'Cause It's Gonna Be Awesome!!!!!
I really am excited about this. I love SSL of course. I mean, I made it and all, but I LOVE SSL in a big crowd. It's really fun. I'd almost describe it as raucous when there's a lot of people - tons of laughs and audible reactions from start to finish- that's why after I saw that a couple times, I started saying it has sorta a midnight movie feel, but it doesn't feel that way with just a couple people watching. The movie is weird, man. It's talking about an incredibly awkward subject. Every scene is doused with a small and strange amount of cheese but filled with scientific words, often spoken quite straight and seriously. It takes a minute to get the feel of the movie, I think.
It doesn't immediately fall into a genre so you can sorta associate it with the familiar rhythms and styles and humor of that type of movie. SSL is kinda out there on it's own, and you might just not feel sure about how to process it at first. But, man, things take off much quicker in a crowd. I don't know what it is. People always say that humor works better in a crowd because people feed off eachother's laughter, and I think that might be true with SSL. People sorta give each other permission to laugh, because, like I said, I think people aren't sure they're allowed to at first because it's such a serious and deeply personal subject sitting amongst the weird, cheesy, tongue-in-cheek stuff. Anyway, it'll be a good time. I'm excited.
Also, Gateway Film Center is Awesome
1. They programmed us, and let me just say I really really appreciate it. because more than a few places and festivals have straight up said to me something to the effect that their audiences would have a problem with the explicit parts (close-ups of real vulvas for demonstration, specifically), and they would like to program us, but it's too much of a risk. Some festivals contacted us saying we were on hold with hopes they could add in a late or midnight screening to put us in, but none ever could make it happen.
Well Gateway, on the other hand, found us and put us right into the doc week. They didn't see us as a risk. They saw us as a movie that people might like to see, and I love them for that. They are putting interesting and unique movies out there every. damn. day. Which brings me to:
2. They have a lot of kick-ass, bleeding edge movies playing all the time at the Gateway. Like right now they have a series of movies from rising French directors. It's called Young French Cinema, and it's just the beginning of the stuff they have there. I'd love to have a place like that here in Indianapolis (We miss you south side Key Cinema!). Don't get me wrong. I love a blockbuster Hollywood movie fo sho, but the newness, and experimentation, and diversity of viewpoint and style that comes from the truly outside Hollywood pieces is absolutely lovely and refreshing and so very worthwhile. So, if you do live around Columbus, and you haven't been to the Gateway yet, I highly suggest you take advantage of what they are offering. It's over 3 hours away for me, but I imagine I'll be making a trip from time to time myself.
8.14.2015
Replying To Comments And Thinking On The Discrepancies Around 'Vaginal Orgasm'
My critiques of a BBC article called, "The Mystery of the Female Orgasm," was posted on Alternet and Salon this week, and that means I got all kinds of comments. And, you know me, I like to engage in those comments as much as I can. It's actually incredibly time-consuming, but I also see it as really important because:
1. I'm just a nobody saying things lots of people don't want to hear and don't see why they should care about, so it's not like I have tons of chances to put my point of view out there for large amounts of people to hear, so I need to take the chance when I get it.
2. It helps me understand what other people hear when they read my writing on this stuff. If people are not getting what I'm saying, then I could be saying it better, and I should adjust.
3. It helps ground me a little bit in reality. I need to always be checking to understand what people are telling me and really consider how that fits into the things I'm saying. Do I need to adjust? Do I need to pull back? Am I overstepping my competence? Are there things that I haven't fully thought through but need to in order to get my point across better?
I don't get that kind of schooling talking to my friends. Honestly, I used to be a nervous wreck when something I wrote got posted somewhere that got lots of comments. My stomach would churn. I would spend excessive amounts of time obsessing over every little reply. I certainly have received lots of fantastic comments in my life, but as you can imagine, the internet comment world can be a nasty place. Contrary commentors are louder and more ready to pounce. Plus the negative stuff just sticks with you more.
Anyway, I am happy to say that I don't get bothered at all anymore. Besides just simply the time it takes to do it all, I don't feel overly obsessive, or annoyed, or insane, or bothered. I really don't - seriously, say any shitty thing you want to say about me or my points - I won't bat an eye. And honestly, I find if I try replying as nicely as possible to people, almost everyone will soften up a bit and engage in more useful conversation. The internet makes people act harsher than they actually are, and I find most people are really quite nice. I actually kind of like it now.
I do hear pretty much the same basic contrary comments every time I write on the topic, so I have had a lot of experience with talking about them. I honestly don't get comments that surprise me - which might be part of the reason it doesn't bother me as much anymore, but all that being true, I still feel like fielding comments is a challenging and useful endeavor. And actually this last round made me feel like I should think about more succinct, relate-able, and thoughtful ways of speaking about the discrepancy between what scientific inquiry has indicated about vaginal orgasm and the fact that some women claim to experience vaginal orgasm. What do I want to say and what can I reasonably say about how this reality should be interpreted for individual women and their partners? What do I want to say about the language we use in this situation? Should I / can I be more speculative about reasons this discrepancy exists? How do I succinctly say what I want to say about why, even with any harm that may come of it, this real discrepancy should be widely understood and thoughtfully discussed.
Anyway, my point it that those are things I'm thinking about now, but a post on that is not a quick post like this one is. I have real, paying work that is taking precedence right now, so I just wanted to give a quick nod to the people over the past week on different forums who inspired my deeper thinking. I have definitely talked in different ways about this topic before, and I went back through some blogs and linked some below that touched on it, but like I said, I need to write something more succinct and clear and all those kinds of things. For now, this will have to do.
Thanks all you commentors out there. I really do appreciate the engagement.
Some past posts on the general topic....
HERE is a post that includes Science, Sex and the Ladies' (the movie not the blog) press kit answers about if we are really saying the vaginal orgasm doesn't exist and if we are calling women liars. This one says things I say all the time. However, I think it focuses a bit more on the simple fact that there is a discrepancy with what science has shown and what women who claim vaginal/g-spot/inner orgasm are claiming, and that it's actually not such a crazy thing to wonder whether some of that discrepancy can be explained because some women say they orgasm this way when they actually do not.
HERE is a post of me ranting (a little, not toooo much) about cries that the vaginal orgasm is picked on too much. Spoiler alert: It's kinda like calling reverse racism...it just doesn't quite fly.
HERE is a post that talks about 1. People telling me the subject's not a useful thing to talk about since all orgasms (even vaginally stimulated one) are clitoral anyway and 2. that I'm an asshole for telling women their vaginal orgasms aren't real. I talk in this post, as I often do, about how important the accurate information is that I'm putting out there, and that it's worth putting out there even though it might be hard to face. However, I also go a little bit into how complicated our culture is around female orgasm and how we should at least be considering the possibility that women might be dealing with that complication in ways that aren't normally considered.
HERE is a post of me talking personally about how hard it has been over the years to say things about vaginal orgasm that I know piss people off. I also talk a little about my own experiences and the possibility that smart, sexual women might be able to convince themselves that they orgasm vaginally when they actually don't.
HERE is a post about how dismissive comments often are - ignoring that the argument that there is a large, encompassing, cultural problem and blaming the problems about lack of female orgasm on intimate partner communication instead.
HERE is a post about the comment I often get telling me that talking about orgasm in a physical way is, like, not cool, man - because love and other pleasures shouldn't be taken out of it. It's a little off topic, but I think it relates.
8.08.2015
Can We Go Beyond Tackling This Problem by Blaming it on Partner Communication?
So, my last post was a long-ass critique of a BBC article about the female orgasm. My biggest reason for doing it was to point out that the inaccuracies in the conclusions being made in much of the lady-gasm research and in science reporting are so boldly off-base that they cannot and should not be ignored any longer. Secondarily, I wanted to point out that the inaccuracies promoted in that article don't just represent a few bad apples, if you will, in an otherwise lovely barrel of apples that is our cultural understanding of female orgasm. Instead, I would say that BBC article fully represents the common, status-quo, largely unquestioned way most people (men and women alike) regard female orgasm, and it is a big ol' barrel of nasty, rotten apples that needs to be thrown out, cleaned, and refilled.
I wanted to write this post here because I noticed that a lot of the publicity that this article got had a tone to it that I thought, quite frankly, didn't get the points I was making. Even from very critically minded, thoughtful people that I have a lot of respect for, there seemed to be a blanket refusal to acknowledge that there was a problem that went beyond a simple breakdown in how a couple talked with each other about their sexual wants and needs. I hit this wall often. I say, "Hey, ya'll! Here's direct, clear evidence that our culture speaks about, depicts, discusses, jokes about, teaches, reports on, and researches female orgasm in ways that, as a whole, reveals a deep misunderstanding of how female orgasms are realistically attained," and the reply is often, "Oh, interesting - but you know, if men and women just talked to each other honestly about what they wanted, there would be no problem at all, probably."
It always seems incredibly dismissive - of the argument I've made, of the influence science, media and education norms have on our lives, and of the uniquely female sexual experience of living in a world that force feeds you unrealistic 'knowledge' about your ability to orgasm. It seems wholly thoughtless to me to assert that these wide and deep misunderstandings and misrepresentations of female orgasm that I have layed out are somehow not going to affect women's sexual lives in a deeper way. I mean, if almost every aspect of our culture misunderstands female orgasm, why would it make sense that somehow when a man and a woman get together, all of those influences just completely go away, and that they can simply figure things out on fully even ground, with no pre-conceived notions or internal damage?
It also always surprises me that there is rarely comment about the specific arguments I make when it comes to the science and culture. Commentators tend to go straight to how this can be corrected in an individual relationship. It is so indicative of the very problems I am speaking out against. Although there is a clear, systematic, large-scale problem here, the tendency is still to ignore that and go straight to blaming women. It becomes, as it has always been, an individual, personal problem. Replying to the idea that there is a large scale culture of female orgasm problem by saying that things would be just fine if the couple just spoke honestly about what they want and need is basically saying the woman is not correctly understanding her sexual needs and not correctly communicating them (cause men aren't having large scale problems having orgasms in sexual interactions). It is really, if you think about it, her problem, an individual deficiency to solve on her own/with her partner, and it's no different and no less harmful than when we used to blame women for being frigid.
4.18.2015
Defending the Harder Parts of Science, Sex and the Ladies
I've been thinking a lot about reactions to Science, Sex and the Ladies. There are, from time to time, some very loud and adamant people that just don't like that I say, in my movie and in this blog; i.e. that it is a reasonable possibility that orgasms caused by stimulation inside the vagina actually aren't a thing. There are plenty of others who are intrigued and excited that I'm saying this, and I feel there are also a lot of people that just feel kinda uncomfortable with what I'm saying, maybe preferring to just stay out of any real debate on the issue. My point of view is not a normal one in the current talking/advising/researching about female orgasm world. It steps clearly out of an anything-anyone-feels-and-says-is-okay-'cause-sex-is-so-diverse-and-personal vibe that I see as pretty prominent in our current progressive sexual culture. The SSL ideas sit strangely at a place that feels too radical for the overall sexual culture and too restricting for the progressive sexual culture. They commit the ultimate feminist sin and question the validity of some claims women make about their own bodies, and they poke at a hornet's nest by continuing a debate that a lot of people want to ignore and gloss over.
At the same time, the SSL movie and this blog also support all kinds of fairly comfortable and familiar things that are easy for anyone, especially progressive feminist and sex activists, to get behind; things about better sexual education, masturbation advocacy, and reducing rape culture. So, I think it might be hard for people to dissect their feelings about it because, well, it's a lot...and it's a mix of the familiar and foreign, the harshly controversial and the obviously progressive, and it's about a topic that is deeply personal and deeply part of a person's being. So, I know that in a lot of ways I'm fighting an uphill battle that people don't really feel like fighting, and I know that things I say can be prickly and feel harsh, but I believe that these things need to be said.
I believe that women are terribly disadvantaged in the sexual culture, and there is barely any acknowledgement of the incredible scope and depth and reach of this inequality. However, I think we women do feel that disadvantage deep in their bones and react to it, both publicly and privately, without really understanding where it is coming from. I see so many women express the disappointment, and hurt, and anger that comes from this in all kinds of diverse ways, but I also see that there is barely a vocabulary for this and certainly not any kind of united front for change. It is all-encompassing and invisible at the same time. When it is recognized to some degree, it is approached more as personal problems than deep cultural wrongs, and thus it doesn't seem that important.
It is important though, and if we as a culture don't start scrutinizing our deeply held beliefs and assumptions about female sexuality, then there will be no change. To me, this starts with the female orgasm, and the incredible non-truths about it that permeate our media, our personal relationships, and our scientific inquiries. The non-truths are so deep that they feel like truths, and that's what makes any activism on this issue so hard but also so important - because change won't just happen on it's own. Our sexual culture and our sexual assumptions needs to be shoved into reality, and getting shoved can hurt.
So that said, let me just speak on the 2 main things people seem to be most bothered by in relation to the activism in the SSL movie and the blog.
No One Cares About Clit vs. Vag Orgasms Anymore!
For those who think making a distinction between vaginal and clitoral orgasms is silly given that the modern, progressive view in the talking/advising/researching-about-female-orgasm-world is that all orgasms are clitoral, no matter if they come from direct stimulation on the clitoral glans or through penetration only: To that I say, I get that you are coming from a place of let's-just-all-get-along, but the truth is we still need to talk about this because only the specific words in this argument have changed over the years. The base of it is still the same as it has always been.
***It still assumes that there is an orgasm that comes from stimulation of the vagina, and that needs to be challenged.***
There are orgasms that happen from some type of direct or indirect stimulation of the outer clitoral/vulva areas. They are uncontroversial, scientifically documented, and seemingly all healthy female bodies are capable of them. Then there are orgasms that happen from some type of stimulation on the inside of the vagina. It doesn't matter if people tell us they think the stimulation point for orgasm involves the g-spot or some aspect of the vaginal wall or some pressing/crushing/indirect stimulation of the inner legs of the clitoris through the vaginal walls (as is the hip modern way to view it). In the end, these orgasms are all supposed to happen without any stimulation of the outer clitoral vulva area. The seemingly "progressive" idea that they might be caused by some type of inner clitoral leg stimulation doesn't change that, and honestly there isn't any more evidence to support the 'inner clit leg hypothesis' than there is to support the idea that a 'vaginal orgasm' is caused by a distinct g-spot or through sensitive tissue on the anterior wall of the vagina.
It's all just conjecture - speculating about the cause of an orgasm that has not, even with all the studies that speculate about it, yet been physically identified. This hypothetical, yet widely believed-in, type of orgasm is controversial, undocumented, and most women do not even claim to have ever had one.
I don't think there is anything silly or unnecessary about trying to clear up confusing, misleading information about how women can realistically achieve orgasm. Simply saying that "it's all clitoral" unfortunately doesn't make it all clear, and I think as a society we can and should begin trying to make this more clear...and doing that has to involve getting deep into the clitoral vs. vaginal orgasm debate.
I'm an Asshole That Calls Women Liars!
The other huge no-no I commit is that I dare to say that orgasm caused only by stimulation of the vagina might not exist even though I know good and well there are some women who say they experience this.
Here's the thing. In a study, asking people to describe what they did is very different than witnessing what they do. Just because a woman says on a survey that she has orgasms through only vaginal stimulation or just because a friend earnestly says the same thing, doesn't mean that it's true.
It seems very un-feminist and arrogant to say that, I know. I leave you to decide how much of an asshole I am for saying that, but I can assure you my intentions are not to shame women or discount women's experiences of their own bodies.
My intention is to point out that there are HUGE problems with accepting women (or anyone) at their word about an experience this fraught with expectation, ignorance, and misconception, when it is absolutely possible to physically check if an orgasm caused only by stimulation iside the vagina has physically occurred or not. It's not like we have to live in the dark. There is a physical reaction that is accepted as orgasm in both men and women, and we can check whether it happens or not. It has been done many times to verify orgasms caused by clitoral glans stimulation and can be done again. Yet it's not happening for 'vaginal orgasms.' If there is a woman out there who has experienced an orgasm caused only by stimulation inside the vagina, we haven't proved it yet. I have no doubt women certainly have the experiences they say they have, but just because they use the word "orgasm" doesn't mean that they physically had the rhythmic release of muscle tension and blood congestion that is uncontroversially known to be an orgasm.
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| You see what I'm saying? There's this idea the female orgasm is some complicated, wildly varied thing when it actually isn't any more complicated than the male orgasm |
My reason for questioning survey results about women's ability to vaginally orgasm goes beyond the fact that science has not actually yet been able to validate those responses. There is also the matter of our culture's unwillingness to define orgasm for women. Even in peer reviewed journal articles, researchers often claim that the female orgasm has not been defined, and there are lots of ways to experience it. I take strong issue with that (and I go into that in a debate HERE), but point is, how can we expect women to answer whether or not they have experienced something when that something is not really defined? One woman may say she has experienced an orgasm thinking it's just a feeling of euphoric happiness during sex and another woman answer it thinking of orgasm in the physical, scientifically understood way I'm talking about it.
On top of that, can we just take a minute to consider how growing up and living in a sexual culture where the most common, expected, most depicted type of sexual interaction (penile-vaginal intercourse) is one that 70% of women admit never causes an orgasm for them. (I would guess that number is much higher). Mix that with the mushiness of the word "orgasm" and the cultural expectation that intercourse should cause orgasm for women as it does for men, and what does that lead to? Might women feel a strong and often unconscious pressure to orgasm from intercourse; a pressure that changes and molds them in a variety of ways, some of which might lead them to say they experience something or even truly feel they experience something that they actually don't?
Further more, let's consider how female orgasm is modeled. In porn the male orgasms are largely real, and the female orgasms, even the very realistic ones, are largely fake, but not always thought of as faked. Porn is the easiest and safest way to experience what sex is and should be like without having to partake in it. Could it be possible, even slightly, that this situation might model for women a sexual experience, somewhat unconsciously, where displaying orgasmic movements and vocalizations at particular moments in a sexual situation is the orgasm? I know that sounds strange, but just roll that around in your head for a while.
I'm not saying that women are intentionally faking orgasm (although we do clearly do that sometimes too). I'm not saying that there is no pleasure in the situation I just described, but I am saying that it is not an orgasm. That way of experiencing sex for a woman is regularly modeled and idolized in our culture, and it might be what some women are actually speaking about when they say that they "orgasm."
I think when one steps back and looks at what is happening in our sexual culture, how complicated and messy our relationships are to the female orgasm, how strong the pressures related to ladygasms are in our culture, how much misinformation is out there, how bad our models for ladygasm are, and how ridiculously undefined the word "orgasm" is for women, does it really seem that crazy to wonder if we are not getting completely accurate answers from women when we ask about orgasm?
It's at least worth gently considering, can we agree on that?
What If, Though?
Let me end with this. If my crazy ol' mean sounding assertion is true - that women don't orgasm from vaginal stimulation, and that sometimes women say they do when they actually don't - then what would that mean for female sexuality?
Seriously, at least take a moment to even slightly consider what that could mean. The investigation of the implications of that possibility is actually what Science, Sex and the Ladies is all about. Like I said above, I don't think the implication of that is a small thing at all. I think that the deep, wide, largely invisible disadvantage this creates for women in our sexual culture colors all (I mean all - men and women, gay, straight, and trans) of our understandings, expectations, and experiences around sex in varying degrees and styles.
I think this predicament is further twisted because men's sexuality grows up so differently. For men the most culturally normal, most commonly depicted, mostly highly prized way of orgasming matches what their bodies are actually capable of. This creates a vast difference between how men and women experience the sexual culture, but the vastness of that difference is rarely understood or recognized. It's part of the invisibility of this problem, but I think the possibilities of how this difference can unnecessarily complicate lives, sexuality, and relationships is staggering.
I know it's uncomfortable, but I really believe we need to do some shoving. This ain't gonna work itself out.
4.10.2015
An Educational Video Meets A Midnight Movie - Finally, We've Given You a Box for Science, Sex and the Ladies!
We have another Review - at Rogue Cinema. Check it out HERE. Thanks to Misty Layne for taking the time to watch and write about it. It's a good review, but I'll be honest. It says something we hear about this movie more than I'd like - "I'm not sure who the audience for this documentary is." I've heard it before, and it always feels like an unnecessary questions to me. I always want to say something like - Did you like it? Then you are the audience. However, I have learned since making this movie, that it does matter to people. Categorizing a movie, and thus categorizing the audience who might watch the movie, makes a big difference, and we probably should have done a better job filling in the details for what box people should fit SSL into with our marketing. We should be telling them, so they don't have to spend any precious time worrying about it. So, I'll address that a little - in my own way, here.
I always knew the movie was hard to categorize. It's a non-fiction movie, but documentary doesn't quite describe it. It's really off-beat with lots of cheese, but not quite the kind of cheese people are used to seeing in their documentaries - the wink and nod to the innocence of the 50's with some cheesy b-roll of a black and white educational film reel featuring shiny happy housewives doing something that seems quaint and silly or with men in suits talking directly to the camera.
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| those silly ol' 50's housewives! What were those 50's people thinking?! |
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| Crazy ol' educational video narrators! So ridiculous, huh?! |
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| That silly ol' dichotomy between "wife-types" and "whore-types" - too bad that dichotomy didn't actually stay in the 50's! |
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| That crazy ol' SSL narrator talking about the 60's/70's sexual revolution not actually being much of a sexual revolution for the female orgasm! |
So, I think the cheese in SSL is an unexpected type of cheese. It's not familiar in the documentary genre. It's also just less like the familiar cheese of say, the Simpsons, and tends more towards something much stranger like Tim and Eric Awesome Show - Great Job!
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| Who doesn't enjoy the cheese of Troy McClure? |
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| Tim and Eric, on the other hand, can get a little weird for some tastes |
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| This is during a musical number called "Petite Feet" which involves..well just google it. |
It's not exactly Tim and Eric styling either though. Yes, we have some rainbow unicorns and other weird, cheesy shit, but we certainly don't take anything as far as they do, and the the big difference is the movie itself is not played as a joke in the way cheesy, weird stuff like Tim and Eric or midnight movies are. Science, Sex and the Ladies is a serious movie. The actual information that is being presented is an accurate, cited, well thought-out, and often densely packed argument. It's just there's this very not-serious element in the visual presentation. So, there's a particular mix of the serious and the silly that clearly doesn't fit a mold.
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| Science, Sex and the Ladies making a point about sprirtual/emotional/non-orgasmic physical pleasure being great and maybe even climactic, but yet still different than an orgasm |
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| The Funbunch! in SSL talking about "Why Ladies Don't Masturbate as Much?" |
The other thing that I think worries people with the categorization is that it's kinda sex-ed like, so people immediately start thinking it's for young people. I get that sex ed is something we think of as a teen sort of thing, and I get that adults always tend to think they are already educated, so it wouldn't occur to them that something sex edish is meant for them too. However, the main point in SSL is that we all need to be re-educated. Our whole sexual culture is misinformed about the basics of female sexual release. That means, with all likelihood and to some degree, you are miseducated, I am miseducated, and the expert we read about sexual matters from is too. We all are. So the movie is aimed at sexual researchers, sexual education experts, and grown-ass married people who've had lots of sex and relationships as much, if not more than, it's aimed at teens. So, it includes some sex ed, but it really isn't aimed at kids...this is also very, very confusing to people.
So, let me now lay out how this movie should be categorized. Science, Sex, and the Ladies is an educational video mixed with a midnight movie. I fully realize that these two genres maybe aren't supposed to be mixed, and the description might not create a satisfactory enough box, but it is at least satisfactory to me...for the moment at least.
Because one cannot decide on an audience for a movie until the movie is appropriately categorized, we can now get back to that question. "Who is the audience for this movie?" At first glance this genre mix doesn't help us answer that question in an easily understandable way. Who watches educational videos? Kids. Who watches midnight movies? Cynical adults who tend toward blue comedy. They simply don't mix!
I see it differently though. An education video is for anyone who wants to learn something....so that's hopefully most people. Plus, as I described above, SSL is meant to re-educate everyone who has been immersed in our current sexual culture - which is, again, most people. I take a lighter view of the midnight movie crowd too. Yes, there is lots of sex and violence and really weird shit and ironic watching, but I think all those things come together because they make a fun experience. The way I see it, midnight movies are for anyone who likes going to the movies and simply having a fun, somewhat raucous, communal experience. To me that's exactly the mix that is SSL - it's a movie that is fun as shit to watch - the more people you watch with, the more fun it is. It creates a communal feeling in the audience - like everyone just went on a weird-ass journey together, but it's more than just fun midnight movie fluff. It is informative and thoughtful, and leaves the viewer with more knowledge and understanding of the world than when they came in.
So there you go. If I must give you a particular "type" of audience for Science, Sex and the Ladies, it is people who would go to a screening of The Room, or Rocky Horror, or Grindhouse, but would also rent informative docs like The Corporation or Bigger, Faster, Stronger (Although, honestly, my real answer is a completely and utterly unacceptable one - I think this movie is for everyone).
1.16.2015
The Female Orgasm Debate With Edward Clint at Skeptic Ink - My Response #1
I have to say, I’m excited to be having this debate, and I want to thank Edward Clint for agreeing to do this. Ed co-produces Skeptic Blogs and writes on a variety of topics there. He is currently a graduate student at UCLA studying Evolutionary Psychology. He has proven to be quite considerate to me and thoughtful about this topic. As Ed said, this is a new debate. It is not building from our original back and forth.
I have written extensively on my stance about female orgasm and made a movie on the topic. So, since my view is already out there, Ed and I agreed that he would begin our discussion with a response to my stance (taken from my movie and my blog – particularly THIS POST explaining why I say that vaginal stimulation has not been shown to cause orgasm). Please check out Ed’s post HERE. We are specifically taking opposite sides of the following statements. I’m on the pro side, of course. *(You can now find Ed's response HERE and My response back HERE).
The Statements to be Debated
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| for the record, I wouldn't define this as orgasm |
The Statements to be Debated
1. Masters & Johnson's (1966) book Human Sexual Response provides the best scientific description of the definition and nature of orgasm.
2. Orgasm is caused by direct or indirect stimulation of the clitoral glans/vulvar area in women.
I’m going to go about this by first outlining my support for these statements. I will keep in mind the objections Ed has outlined, and do my best to touch on those. After that, I will respond specifically and in more detail to each of his objections in the appendices. Hopefully, this can allow those who want to read just the gist to drop off before it gets more detailed.
Support for Statement 1
Masters & Johnson's (1966) book Human Sexual Response provides the best scientific description of the definition and nature of orgasm.
Masters and Johnson’s (M&J’s) description of the physical markers of orgasm are what I believe the scientific definition of the word orgasm should be based upon. Very basically, the main physical marker is a rhythmic release of the pelvic muscle tension and blood congestion that has developed during sexual arousal. It’s measurable, well known, possible in both men and women and in people all across the world, and relies on the well known and heavily agreed upon physical markers of sexual arousal in order to come about. No other commonly used definition of orgasm is that verifiable, that universal, or that directly linked to the physical elements of sexual arousal.
This definition of orgasm makes sense even given the immense variation in psycho-social elements that affect people’s ability to attain orgasm and the meaning and subjective pleasure they find in it. This physiological event exists as a human event that can and does occur in direct relation to human sexual arousal. Plus, although the psycho-social elements are absolutely integral in understanding things like who has orgasms, why people don’t have them, and what significance orgasm has to a population, the event still exists on its own and stands as a good definition of orgasm. Let me elaborate on why this physiologic definition of orgasm seems most sensible to me.
1 The orgasmic muscle contractions described by M&J are not under dispute as a marker for sexual climax. Although the word orgasm and its meaning are contentious, this marker for sexual climax is not, and it is already part of any sensible and knowledgeable definition out there for orgasm (Meston et al p174). It is known to exist in both men and women and is a thing that the majority of women and almost all men experience (even if they have wildly different ways of getting to it and diverse feelings about it). So, there is agreement that this exists and about how it behaves and is measured. It is already a respected and widespread definition of orgasm. I am merely proposing it be the definition. There is a universal element to this definition particularly because it is a physiologic one.
Ed objects to aspects of the 1966 M&J study in an attempt to discredit their findings about orgasm. The objections are sometimes blatantly wrong and other times simply not a good argument for disregarding or discrediting it. I have specific responses to his full list of objections and also a response to Ed’s citation that claims to directly dispute M&J’s finding (it absolutely does not ) in appendix A below. M&J is a 50 year old study, and things have changed. Their work has been expanded on. More work has gone into things like hormonal activity during arousal and orgasm, and modern ways to record the physical markers of arousal and orgasm have been developed (M&J used to actually get down there and measure parts by hand to check for vasocongestion. Photoplethysmographs are now often used to do that), but these markers M&J identified are still understood as important markers. Their work in Human Sexual Response is by far the largest and most comprehensive physiological study of arousal and orgasm that exists. It is fundamental and has not been rejected or seriously debased over the last 50 years (Meston et al p180).
2 There, of course, are other experiences some would put forward as being orgasms; ejaculation, tantric/spiritual/mental experiences, or a type of inner/vaginal/uterine/g-spot/anal climax that specifically does not involve the recordable muscular activity described by M&J. That’s not a complete list, but it’s some of the usual suspects, and I think it's problematic to call or insinuate that any of these things are orgasm.
Ejaculation is a sexual response but is a different physiologic event than orgasm. This is true for both men and women...and although men almost always experience it, since it is linked to orgasm in males, it may not be common among women. The rest of the above options have no set of physical markers that could let a scientist know that these events are occurring. The respondent must be taken at their word that there is a climactic sexual experience happening. The only exception to this would be some studies showing mental activity during a time when the respondent claims to orgasm. This is a recordable response, but as of yet there is no clear understanding of whether the brain activity seen is a reliable marker to indicate any particular kind of climactic sexual experience, much less the muscle contractions identified by M&J’s work. There is also no understanding of what that brain activity correlates to physically, or if it correlates to anything physical at all. Brain activity may be an interesting avenue of research to pursue, but to be convincing as a marker for orgasm, that mental activity should also correlated with a culmination of or climax to physical sexual arousal.
3 Which brings me to my major reason for calling the muscle activity described by M&J orgasm (and biggest qualm with calling these other things orgasm). The M&J described orgasm has a physiologic quality that is quite specifically the physical climax of changes in the body that happen during human sexual arousal, and those other things in the list are not. To be clear here, I’m not arguing that those other things have no value, are not pleasurable, or don’t feel climactic. I’m not even arguing that orgasm is the most pleasurable thing a person can experience regarding sex. I’m arguing that these other things are something different and not events that rely on and relieve the muscle tension and blood congestion in the pelvic region induced by sexual arousal. I believe that makes this event more than just one of many possible experiences that people find pleasurable or climactic during sex. It makes this event an orgasm.
Before I move on, let’s get back to sexual arousal because I think it is often hard to separate the ideas of arousal and orgasm, and I’ve found over and over through the years that discussing the two as separate seems to cause major confusion about what I am arguing. So...Yes, sexual arousal can be “turned on” in humans in an infinite number of ways. It’s got everything to do with psycho-social and circumstantial variables. The thing is though, however one gets it started, sustains it, or increases it (and that process really is as unique as people are), when it happens, the body reacts largely the same in all humans. The basic markers of sexual arousal that M&J noted (such as penile erection, vaginal lubrication, testes being pulled up against the body, and repositioning of the uterus/elongation of the vagina - all due to pelvic vasocongestion and muscle tension), have certainly been expanded upon over the last 50 years, but they are basically the same things researchers still today use to denote arousal. Increased heart rate, raised blood pressure, increased pain theshold and pupil dilation are also used but are indicators of regular ol’ non-sexual arousal as well. So, how one gets aroused, how he/she feels about it, and expectations surrounding arousal are incredibly complicated and variable, but how the body responds to that arousal seems to be quite universal.
The orgasm is absolutely dependent on that physical arousal because there needs to be sexual muscle tension and blood congestion present for there to be an event (the orgasm) that releases that tension. It’s clear that orgasms don’t happen without arousal and arousal doesn’t happen without activities that are steeped heavily in psycho-social elements, so a complete study of orgasms among humans is naturally tied to the psycho-social. However, the definition of orgasm, doesn’t need to be.
Why it's important to make this distinction
I really do understand that the feelings around a word like orgasm are complicated. I really do know that although I have no intention of telling women that there is only one way to enjoy sex (for instance - experiencing the orgasm defined by Masters and Johnson), that none the less, my simply saying that there should be a standardized definition of the word orgasm, is enough to make some people feel slighted, misunderstood, or inadequate. I don’t love that, but I think that advocating for clarity in the discussion of female sexual response is worth the trouble it digs up.
There is confusion about the word orgasm. Researchers, doctors, therapists, sexual advisers, and random people who want to speak about orgasm from a place of even limited authority could continue to use that word loosely, to make statements about orgasm without being specific about what is meant, but I think it only leads to spinning our wheels on the topic. Saying that situation A causes an orgasm in one study and that situation B causes an orgasm in another study, is most helpful when the word orgasm means the same thing in both. Right now, it does not - way too often. It seems to me like people involved in this discussion are talking around each other and there needs to be clarity of language…to help women understand their situation and to help researchers build from each other's work more easily.
As I described above, I think orgasm should be used to describe the M&J definition of orgasm. I also think ejaculation should be used to describe ejaculation, and a climactic experience should be used to describe a climactic experience sans orgasm. Other more specific words could come to light to categorize these other mental or physical climactic experiences as researchers hopefully gain clear understanding of what these are and how to identify them. Also, I think scientists should be cognizant of the mixed use of the word "orgasm." If talking about reported cases of orgasm, there should be an understanding that a claim of “orgasm” could mean a wildly large amount of different events, and data should be assessed with that in mind. I believe that clarity of language is absolutely necessary for the discussion about female orgasm to move forward (instead of in confusing circles like it seems to be doing now).
Statement 1 Conclusion
I do also get where Ed is coming from when he says that orgasm is “a mental event, an experience.” He’s right, it is both of those things, but so is every other thing we humans do. It’s not useful as a definition. It's also not a reason to disregard the M&J characterization as insufficient. The physical characterization of orgasm proposed is an undisputed reaction that can happen to both men and women all across the world at the climax of a person’s physical sexual arousal. The contractions can be weak or strong, have a somewhat variable rhythm, last for a somewhat variable amount of time, but the basic description set forth by M&J is a sensible definition for orgasm. The fact that there is infinite variation in how people get from no arousal to orgasm, or in how people subjectively experience this event does not mean that we don’t or can’t have a good definition of orgasm. Similarly the infinite subjective experience of a heart attack, and the many discussions existing about what causes them and what prevents them, does not negate that it is a blockage of oxygen-rich blood to the heart muscle. Both a heart attack and orgasm exist as a thing that can be defined, and all the psycho-social things around us can inhibit them, help them, affect the framework in which they are practiced, and bring different meanings to them. However, it is difficult to really discuss those psycho-social aspects in any meaningful way unless there is a clear definition of what it is they are affecting, and that clear definition is exactly what I propose.
Support for Statement 2
Orgasm is caused by direct or indirect stimulation of the clitoral glans/vulvar area in women.
I think my support of statement 1 stands on pretty firm ground, but I willingly admit this second statement is slightly mushier. However, it doesn’t have to do with the arguments about Female Genital Mutilation (FGM), cervical stimulation in women with spinal injuries, culture considerations or dildos as Ed suggests. It does have something to do with his point about M&J’s findings regarding orgasms during intercourse though. I actually think some of M&J's findings are the best arguments against this second statement. So, let me tell you why I think there’s mushiness in this argument, and then I’ll tell you why, even with the mushiness, it’s still the most sensible one.
The reasons for this mushiness in Statement 2
1 My assertion is not based on undeniable proof. It’s based on an overwhelming amount of evidence that stimulation of the clitoral glans/vulva area can induce orgasm and an overwhelming lack of evidence that any-other-thing-stimulated can induce orgasm. That’s why I make that assertion. It’s about the evidence as is. However, although there has been about 50 years since M&J first came out, and so far there still isn’t much to go on for the “any-other-thing-stimulated can induce orgasm” statement, it's possible there could be in the future.
2 It is all very close together down there. It doesn’t seem impossible for the clitoral glans area, without being directly touched, to be stimulated just enough to orgasm from movement in areas close by such as;
the in-out movement of a phallus in the vagina,
or strong vibration on a close-by area,
or specific muscular movement that might shift things slightly in the vulvar area.
I think it’s incredibly important in science and in sexual advice to parse out as clear and detailed an understanding about what is and is not known to induce orgasm as we possibly can be. That means really trying to figure out the specifics of what touches what. I will continue to argue that this is meaningful and incredibly important, but I get that it can get a little nuanced for some people’s taste.
3 Like Ed mentioned about good ol’ Master’s and Johnson’s 1966 book Human Sexual Response, they did record orgasms in women during vaginal penetration with no additional stimulation. I would add that they also found 3 women (all of whom could additionally orgasm through clitoral glans area stimulation and through intercourse) who achieved orgasm through breast stimulation without additional clitoral manipulation.
Yet Statement 2 is still the best bet
Those 3 points all kinda go together so let me just explain a little. The M&J accounts of both the intercourse and the breast induced orgasms were observed and recorded in the lab. They documented both subjective accounts of the orgasms and objective recording of the orgasmic pelvic muscular activity. There are no other studies that document an objective recording of orgasmic pelvic muscular activity for orgasms stimulated from anything but the clitoral/vulva area – not stimulation of the breasts (besides M&J), not anuses, not G-spots, V-spots, C-spots nor other spots, not from the inner clitoral legs being pushed on or "crushed" through the vaginal wall, not the vaginal wall itself, and not even any other intercourse induced orgasms like the M&J documented ones above (I’ll get back to these in a minute).
Those studies just don’t exist. There’s plenty of claims in surveys and even in labs studies that these other types of stimulation do cause women to orgasm, but the physical evidence just has not been taken; or the physical evidence taken was things like heart rate, blood pressure, pupil dilation, or pain tolerance – all things that are certainly markers of arousal (both general arousal and sexual arousal) but not necessarily of orgasm; or it’s a brain scan that might suggest an orgasm, but there is no recording of the pelvic muscle activity to go along with it, and no certainty that the brain activity seen means anything about a physiologic response in the body – much less orgasmic muscular activity. These other studies and surveys that suggest female orgasm caused by something other than clitoral/vulva area stimulation exists, simply don’t give any actual evidence that this is the case.
Okay, so there is a striking lack of evidence for non clitoral/vulva area induced orgasms, except for M&J’s work. It might seem problematic to my statement, but it’s less than you’d think. M&J asserted that the orgasms through intercourse, the ones with no other clitoral/vulva area stimulation, were actually stimulated through the clitoral glans indirectly. They asserted that the clit was rubbed through a Rube-Goldberg-like situation in which the labia pulled on the clitoral hood which rubbed against the clitoral glans – so it was quite indirect.
They give no explanation about the mechanism for which the breast orgasms happened, but they say that the timing of the physiologic markers during arousal and orgasm in both the intercourse and breast orgasm were quite similar. Both were also the weakest type of orgasms that the women had. All the physiologic markers and muscular activity for orgasm were recorded, but they were just objectively recorded as weaker and subjectively reported by the women as weaker. In fact, for the entire study, M&J report that in terms of both the objective intensity of muscle spasms recorded and the subjective reporting of the woman, the masturbatory orgasms were ranked highest, followed by partner manipulation and the lowest intensity reported and recorded was achieved through intercourse (and breast stimulation) (Masters 1966 p133). So, given that the low intensity of the orgasm correlated with more indirectness of the stimulation, it might be just as likely, if not more likely, evidence for the importance of clitoral glans area stimulation for female orgasm, rather than being evidence for inner vaginal induced orgasms. As for the breast stimulation, this is up for debate and hopefully more study. I once put forth a thought on my blog that maybe, during the breast stimulation, some muscle tensing in the vulvar area, once the women had become highly aroused, moved everything around down there just enough to get a touch of clit stimulation and set off the orgasm. Who knows? It’s merely a guess that goes along with the pattern of really indirect stimulation giving less intense orgasms.
Ed's Objections
As I said before, Ed's point about intercourse related orgasms in the M&J study was valid, but his other objections relating to cervical stimulation in women with spinal injury, orgasm in women with FMG, or lesbians buying dildos, aren't useful. They're interesting, but they simply don't contradict Statement 2. The truth is there simply are not studies (the one's Ed cites included) that document a situation where stimulation on anything other than the clitoral/vulva area causing the M&J identified muscle contractions of orgasm. You can read my more detailed response to each of his objections below in Appendix B. However, I do want to speak quickly on Ed's assertion about women with FMG. He cites a study from 1989 that surveys women in an area with an incredibly high incidence of a particularly ugly type of FMG in which the labia is sewn together leaving a flat surface with only a tiny whole left from which the women must pee, menstruate and eventually have intercourse (there is often a knife used on the wedding night). It has been long assumed that the clitoral glans was always cut off with this type of FMG (known as type III), but recently surgeons who do reconstructive surgery for women with FMG have discovered that this is not often the case. Intact clitoral glans are found behind the tissue. One study showed this finding in 40% of the women with type III FMG. So, at least some of the women in the study Ed cites may not be without a clitoris as he assumes they are. If these women are having orgasms (and it’s just a type of survey with no physical validation for their responses) they very well might be having them because they have clit-hiding scar tissue to rub up against their husbands’ pelvises.
Statement 2 conclusion
So, there are things that could easily make me change my mind on the basic need for clitoral/vulva area stimulation in order to orgasm. One of those things would be one study, any study, that makes a physically verified causal connection between stimulation not involving that clitoral/vulva area and orgasmic muscle contraction. There's certainly studies connecting other types of stimulation to arousal or to feelings of pleasure, and those are interesting and useful inquiries into human sexuality. However, this is about the orgasm, and studies like what I'm asking for are hard to come by, and I challenge anyone to find one. Studies trying to make this causal connection can be done and should be done. It's quite mystifying that they don't exist.
Like I mentioned above, there is actually some debatable evidence for a direct connection between breast stimulation and orgasm, but those studies were done 50 years ago and reported in the M&J study that Ed thinks is not quite up to par, so take that as you will. Other than the M&J study, the only thing to go on is the accounts of women who say they can orgasm from other kinds of stimulation. These accounts are great starting points for investigation into female sexuality, and should never be discounted. However, there should be an effort to physically verify these claims, and as of yet, this has not been done properly.
There's plenty more to read in the Appendices. Appendix C was added for my responses to Ed's objections that weren't categorization with Appendix A or B. Enjoy. Thanks again to Ed Clint!
Appendix A
Masters and Johnson made major contributions to knowledge about sex. However, the idea that the scientific understanding of the clitoris, orgasm, and female sexual response crystallized 5 decades ago thanks to a non-refereed publication based on a few experiments with tiny, unrepresentative samples in artificial, ecologically non-valid circumstances is preposterous on the face of it. As a psychologist, I do believe I would be laughed out of the room if I proposed such a basis for some description of a pan-human bit of psychology. Here is a short list of the limitations and flaws of M&J 1966.
- Tiny sample sizes that offer no statistical power to generalize
It may be too small for Ed’s tastes, but there is no other physiological investigation into the body’s responses to arousal and orgasm that is near this large; 382 women and 312 men and a minimum of 7,500 complete cycles of sexual response (Masters 1966 p.12-15). I’d love a bigger study with more modern amenities, but this is the best we have, and honestly, I think calling it tiny is a bit of a stretch.
- Use of sex workers as participants, which can hardly be called representative of women in general
Not actually true - although, I don’t see this as a problem anyway. Sex workers were used as preliminary subjects, because they were available, as an investigation into how tests should be set up and run. M&J explicitly said that they did not use this population in their final analysis. “The interrogative material and experimental results derived from the prostitution population have not been included in the material being presented.” (Masters 1966 p.11) And frankly, even if they did use prostitutes, I don’t see why their physiological sexual response would be any different than any other woman or man. We all have the same parts down there (as long as no disease is present).
- Sex in a laboratory setting probably is not representative of other settings
Agreed. Sex in a laboratory setting is different from sex in other places. This is an issue to consider in any sexual study, and M&J knew this. My biggest worry here would be that people find it hard to become aroused in this situation. The people in the M&J study obviously were able to overcome that since they did physically become aroused and physically orgasmsed. Of course this may skew the study towards people who are able to become aroused in these situations, but that is a common problem among any study of the body during arousal and orgasm....and even people who get aroused by laboratories have the same genitals as the rest of us.
- No replications
Granted, a giant study where people are hooked up to physiologic monitors and asked to do sexual acts while the researchers measure and record has not, very unfortunately, been done since. However, like I said above, the work is fundamental and there have been many studies that replicate the measurement of arousal and orgasm in people without finding anything contradictory to what M&J found. There has even been findings that work within M&J's, but also expand on it. For instance THIS study found some more variation in the pelvic muscle responses than did M&J (1 male who could have multiple orgasms before his ejaculation). (3)
- Participants were “WEIRD” in the Henrichian sense: of a Western, Educated, Industrialized, Rich, and Democratic society. Trisha believes the study of one culture, ours, proves things about the human species.
Well, if Human Sexual Response was a study focused on behavior or psychology rather than physiological reactions to arousal and orgasm then I think this would be an incredibly valid criticism. However, ladies all over the world have the same parts, just like men all over the world do. Granted, the women in other parts of the world might need to think and do different things to become aroused (this is incredibly dependent on psycho-social element), but when they do become aroused, it can be detected in their bodies just the same way we detect it in WEIRD bodies. We can also detect when they are having orgasms, just the same way we detect it in WEIRDs.
Sometimes producing findings that directly contradict M&J, such as Robert King et al. 2011:Fundamentally, these data would seem to contradict the Masters and Johnson (1965) view that masturbatory orgasms are the same as those achieved through intercourse, especially in terms of pleasure and sensation.
This quote boldly stood out to me, back when I read this particular article, as fully inaccurate, so it’s unfortunate that it was picked to prove there is data contradicting M&J’s work. “These data” that the quote is discussing are ones that show (they thought somewhat surprisingly) that a good number of orgasms with a partner were subjectively rated lower than masturbatory orgasms by women in their study (another group of partner orgasms were rated higher, but they found that less surprising). Anyway, that’s not contradictory at all to M&J’s findings. Although M&J were clear through the study that the basic physiological elements such as spasmic release of muscle tension were universal to all orgasms, including masturbatory and those had during intercourse, they never held that they were the same in terms of pleasure or sensation.
In fact, the surprising finding from the study above is specifically supported. M&J reported in terms of both the objective intensity of muscle spasms recorded and the subjective reporting of the woman, that masturbatory orgasms were ranked highest, followed by partner manipulation. The lowest rated orgasms were those achieved during intercourse (Masters 1966 p133). M&J clearly claimed that the physical markers in orgasms during masturbation and intercourse were the same, but never claimed that any other element of these orgasms including intensity, length, meaning, or subjective pleasure were the same.
Appendix B
V. Infibulated women in the SudanWomen in a non-western culture without all that Freud baggage and social expectation still have VIO’s. Hanny Lightfoot-Klein (1989) described the culture as such that women must hide all sexual interest and response in order to appear chaste and modest. They must hide orgasms, or, if they can’t hide them, deny that the outburst was caused by the sex acts. Nonetheless, 90% of the 300 women interviewed said they had orgasms, some even saying “always”. We know, too, that none of these were “clitoral” orgasms, because none of these women have a clitoral glans or labia. They all have a “full pharaonic” type infibulation that involves removal of virtually all external genitalia. I am beyond astonished that women who have been so tragically mutilated can ever enjoy sex at all (many of them do not). Lightfoot-Klein is not the only report of this phenomenon, in the paper she also cited Money et al. (1955) and Verkauf (1975).
First off – love this article. I had not heard of it before this. I found it to be informative, sincere, and thought provoking, but not contradictory to my stance for variety of reasons. Firstly, it is actually quite possible some of these women had partial or intact clits under their scar tissue that could be engaged for orgasmic response.
Let me explain a bit. In the study, the author interviews over 800 women and 300 men, and found that 90% of the women claimed to have orgasms with their husband anywhere from rarely to always. It doesn’t break down the percentages of the always or the sometimes or the rarelys, but it doesn’t matter too much. At the time this was written, the standard thought was that women with FGM could not possibly orgasm, and this article’s author, I think, really wanted to point out that this is simply not true. Since then, there have been plenty more studies suggesting that women with FGM can orgasm (4,5,12). This seemingly improbable ability is likely in no small part to what surgeons who do reconstructive surgery for FGM have begun observing.There is often some parts of the clitoral glans left after FMG.
In fact, in the type of FGM that is practiced among the culture in this study, type III (also called infibulation), there was an unexpected reality that came to light when reconstructive surgery became more common (4,5,12). Nour et al found an intact clitoris in 48% of 40 infibulated/type III women undergoing corrective surgery. Type III FMG is pretty terrible. At its worst, the clitoral glans inner labia are completely cut off, then the labia majora is sewn together leaving only a pinhole sized opening for, you know, urination, menstruation, childbirth, and intercourse (knifes are often used on the wedding night). As I discussed, it used to be assumed that the clitoris was always cut in this type III, but as surgeons have shown us more recently, this isn't always the case. In fact, after direct observation, this definition has been disputed enough that the World Health Organization changed the definition of Type III FMGs (the type from the ) from saying that the clitoris is always cut to defining it as one in which the skin is sewn together “with or without excision of the clitoris.” (14) Given that this article mentions that these surgeries, especially in the outlying areas, are done by untrained midwives, it doesn't seem that strange that there would be a variety in the types of cutting that is done. The statement from some women in the article that their scar tissue was erotically sensitive would also indeed point to some having a clitoris or part of a clitoris behind the scar tissue.
However, there’s not a lot of information to go on in this article besides a few specific anecdotes. It’s more like a thoughtful and informed story than a set of data being discussed. There is no distinction given about how all these women achieved the orgasm. Were they grinding against their husbands? One woman who said she orgasmed frequently said she “moved around a lot during intercourse.” Could she be grinding her hidden clitoris against her husband during intercourse? Or, was it a vaginally induced orgasm? We just don’t know. The “moving around a lot” woman was about as detailed as it got. It’s also questionable whether all or any of the events these women describe as “orgasm” was even a physiological event. If I know anything about the word orgasm, I know that it is an incredibly culturally steeped word, so I have no idea what they mean when they say orgasm, and neither does the author.
My point here is that this study is not much different from any study asking women about orgasm. There simply isn’t any physical data to verify what they mean when they say it, and their method for getting an orgasm during intercourse (I’ll go ahead and assume there’s not a lot of oral or masturbating going on, but it’s not actually discussed) are not disclosed. Given that these FMG procedures do not universally leave women without an intact clitoral glans, these women could be getting these orgasms just about anyway any American woman could have gotten one.
(Just for fun, I’d like to openly wonder if these women and men in this culture, having probably not seen a lot of simulated sex on tv, movies, and porn, might be somewhat better off in terms of women reaching orgasm during intercourse than western folks. The fast, in-out-in-out style that is often depicted here, doesn’t tend towards a body position with the outer vulva in constant contact with the males body. Maybe, left to our own devices without pre-conceived ideas about what sex should look like, women and men tend to cling closer to each other and more gently move their pelvises in whatever ways feels good – making a grinding-the-clit style orgasm during intercourse more likely. Just a thought to ponder.)
VI. Women with spinal cord injuries experience orgasmsThe clitoris and vulva are innervated by the pudenda spinal nerve. However, in women who have no sensation in the pelvic region due to spinal cord injury, sexual response including orgasm have been documented in several papers. Komisaruk et al’s (2004) replication included fMRI brain imaging showing activation consistent with orgasm. They postulate this is possible due to the vagus nerve, a cranial, not spinal, nerve with projections in the pelvis. Several studies including that one also used as stimuli penetrative vaginal-cervical stimulation, not clitoral.See Sipski et al 1995a and b; Whipple et al 1996; and Komisaruk et al 2004.
I actually think the research into women with Spinal Cord Injury (SCI) and ability to orgasm is pretty cool stuff - and incredibly promising for many women with SCI. The studies Ed includes here show that although spinal injury has occurred at a location and to an extent that would seem to indicate a lack of ability to orgasm, orgasm does still occur for many women with SCI. Sipski et al tends toward this having something to do with reflex autonomic activity and Komisaruk , and Whipple tend towards this having something to do with the Vagus nerve having a direct path from the cervix to the brain.
Also, the approaches in these 2 articles were different. Sipski’s work compared SCI and non SCI women, finding that when left to their own devices to stimulate themselves to orgasm, all of the non-SCI and about 50% of the SCI women verbally reported orgasm within 75 minutes (although many as quickly as under 10 minutes). All but 3 of the women chose the clitoris as part of their preferred stimulation (the other 3 reported their stimulation as vaginal area. None reported vaginal penetration). Physiologic data including blood pressure, heart rate, and respiration were recorded and reported. Pelvic muscle contractions were recorded, but not reported - and it doesn't say why.
Also, the approaches in these 2 articles were different. Sipski’s work compared SCI and non SCI women, finding that when left to their own devices to stimulate themselves to orgasm, all of the non-SCI and about 50% of the SCI women verbally reported orgasm within 75 minutes (although many as quickly as under 10 minutes). All but 3 of the women chose the clitoris as part of their preferred stimulation (the other 3 reported their stimulation as vaginal area. None reported vaginal penetration). Physiologic data including blood pressure, heart rate, and respiration were recorded and reported. Pelvic muscle contractions were recorded, but not reported - and it doesn't say why.
In the Komisurak, Whipple study, 5 women were given cervical stimulation (and it’s a particular kind of cervical stimulation that involves a pessary, which is kinda like a hard cervical ring that had to be sutured to the cervix. Then there is a piece on the pessary that can be attached to the cervical stimulator device that is inserted into the vagina. It sort of puts suction-y pressure on the cervix that the woman controls herself. It’s not your average vaginal stimulation, ya know?) and 3 of them verbally reported orgasm which was accompanied by an increase in brain activity in places the researchers felt, given some past studies, were consistent with what would be expected during orgasm. Pelvic muscular contraction, heart rate, respiration, and blood pressure were not measured and neither was pelvic muscular activity. They suggest the Vagus nerve bypasses the spine and makes this possible.
The first study does not support the idea that any kind of inner vaginal stimulation causes orgasm. All the stimulation to orgasm in it was in the form of some kind clitoral/vulvar stimulation (although 3 seemed to be closer to the vagina than the clitoris). The 2nd article doesn’t even discuss it. The Komisurak,Whipple study supports a very type of particular type of cervical stimulation having some amount of direct pathway to the brain. It also found increased brain activity at the time women stimulating their cervix this way claimed to orgasm. However, as of yet there is no clear understanding of whether that brain activity is a reliable marker to indicate any particular kind of climactic sexual experience, much less the muscle contractions identified by M&J’s work (which were not tested for). There is also no understanding of what that brain activity correlates to physically, or if it correlates to anything physical at all. None of these studies discredit the 2 statements in question.
The dildo problem[The sex shop called] Sh™ have an extensive lesbian clientele who have no motivation to pander to male egos, expectations or even existence in sexual terms. Thus they provide an interesting test of what women actually want, away from ideological constraint, voting with their wallets. A typical, although by no means universal, lesbian desire, as represented by products bought, is for penetration. For example the Fun Factory Strap-on™ provides internal stimulation for both (female) partners. If it were true that penetration in sex is something done only to pander to male egos then the existence of such toys requires explanation.
How exactly does this defy my explanation? I certainly never said penetrative sex is something done only to pander to male ego. I never even said women don’t like vaginal penetration. In fact I took great pains in the last two responses I wrote to Ed to make that point clear. Of course vaginal stimulation and penetration can be and often are desired, arousing, and well liked sexual activities. My beef is about people saying or insinuating that stimulation on the inner parts of the vagina – alone - cause orgasm. Women buying dildos doesn’t also mean they are orgasming from vaginal stimulation. I think that is obvious.
VIII. On sensitivity and innervationIt is argued that the vagina has little or no sensitivity, and therefore it is unlikely to be instrumental in orgasm, particularly compared to the highly sensitive clitoris. It is a fact that the vagina is not especially sensitive compared to other body parts. However, there are three reasons I think this argument is inadequate...
He’s got a valid point. The simple fact that the vagina has a lower amount of nerves doesn't automatically lead to the vagina's inability to induce orgasm. I admit I have used the lack of vaginal innervation in this way even though it's not a good argument. I have seen the errors of my ways, and I don’t do it anymore (even though it is mentioned in the movie…Sorry - I talk about that HERE). However it is still true that there is no positive evidence that stimulation of the inner vagina causes orgasm.
Appendix C
I further submit that M&J is not considered the “gold standard” among psychologists, psychiatrists and other researchers. Seminal, perhaps. But the reigning and authoritative model? Not hardly. One of the problems M&J stipulated themselves: the relationship between physiologic, psychological, and sociological factors is qualitatively and quantitatively “totally variable” from one woman to the next (p. 127). M&J focus on the physiologic, calling it an admittedly limited jumping off point that has a degree of objectivity, even if it does not capture the nature of the phenomenon.
It might not be the reigning and authoritative model on how people feel about orgasm or how they describe them or any other thing psychologists study, but it’s pretty fundamental to the physiologic understanding of orgasm and arousal. That’s pretty hard to deny. There is simply not another large study that recorded and described what the body does during sufficient sexual stimulation. It’s clear that Masters and Johnson understood that there were subjective psycho-social aspects to arousal and orgasm – things like; the way a person subjectively feels about their orgasm, how a person prefers to control their orgasmic response, what kind of noises a person makes, what stimulus halts the progression of arousal, and what stimulus increases arousal. The options are unlimited. These are not unimportant to a person’s experience. However, they don’t change the basic physical path the body takes.
If you read further in that passage Ed takes from above,
“Where possible, material presented reflects consideration of three interacting areas of influence upon female orgasmic attainment previously recognized in attempts to understand and to interpret female sexual response: (1) physiologic (characteristic physical conditions and reactions during the peak of sex tension increments); (2)psychological (psychosexual orientation and receptivity to orgasmic attainment); (3) sociologic (cultural, environmental, and social factors influencing orgasmic incidence or ability. The quantitative and qualitative relationship of these factors appears totally variable between one woman’s orgasmic experiences, and orgasm as it occurs in other women. Only baseline physiological reactions and occasional individually characteristic modes of expression remain constant from orgasm to orgasm, reflecting the human female’s apparent tendency toward orientation of sexual expression to psychosocial demand.”
It seems that M&J were actually saying that even with the incredibly variable psycho-sociol elements that make women’s relationship to orgasm quite diverse, the physiological markers of orgasm were the only constant. So, yes, to have a deep, full, complex understanding of what an orgasm is in the human experience is quite complicated and beyond Human Sexual Response, but to have a clear, detailed, seemingly universal understanding of what an orgasm looks like physically, is not that complicated at all and within the scope of Human Sexual Response.
Kaplan (1977) wrote that M&J did not even mention sexual desire! How can a coherent account of human sexual response neglect to consider sexual desire? As if sexuality and sexual experience is about quantified muscle contractions and blood flow.
I honestly don’t know how to be more clear about this. Sexuality and human sexual experience does not need to be quantified or described in order to understand what an orgasm is. An orgasm is an orgasm. Obviously sexuality and sexual experience is not merely about muscle contractions and blood flow, but the physical definition of an orgasm is very much about that.
Research has expanded in other directions as well. MRI and sonography have provided better understanding of the biomechanics of sex than M&J ever had. They wrote that the sole purpose of the clitoris was to create or elevate sexual tension by stimulation of the glans. This is almost certainly not correct. Research is on-going, but more recent studies suggest the erectile tissue of the clitoral complex helps tent the vagina for intercourse. During intercourse, the penis tends to compress the clitoral body and jam the anterior vagina against the root of the clitoris, causing a pumping action on the Kobelt plexus (Buisson et al, 2010).
MRI and sonography have certainly expanded on the understandings of biomechanics of sex. M&J actually did acknowledge their limitations in understanding the clitoris.
“It should be emphasized that the exact roles of the crura (clitoral legs), suspensory ligaments, and various muscle bundles in clitoral retraction have not been determined with total conviction.” (Masters 1966 p51)
I think these and other technologies could be promising in allowing observation of the physical reactions during intercourse in women who say they have orgasms from nothing more than inner vaginal stimualtion. Unfortunately, to date, these observations have never been made. The Buisson et al 2010 paper Clint speaks of was useful and interesting in that it did in fact show that in one couple the erect penis compressed the clitoral legs during intercourse. Although the woman in this study claimed that she regularly has vaginally induced orgasms (VIO), she nor her partner orgasm in this study, so it really gives us nothing but a possible future investigative direction when it comes to the question of what VIOs are, what stimulation is needed to attain them, and how the body reacts. And on a side note, the study doesn’t give a reason why the couple stops before orgasm. Wouldn’t it have been a great aspect to this study?
Evolutionary psychologists have also investigated possible psychological mechanisms involved in sexual response—Men’s masculinity and attractiveness predict their female partners’ reported orgasm frequency and timing. [Link]
Maybe women with more attractive men orgasm more frequently during intercourse, and maybe they don’t. It doesn’t matter to the physical definition of orgasm. Just to humor it though, if this is meant to have something to do with the idea of a VIO, then it is a terribly inconclusive study on the topic. The questionnaires the women answered did not differentiate between orgasms from vaginal intercourse only and those caused with ancillary clitoral stimulation. It’s also a questionnaire without physical verification of these women’s answers, so any claims of VIO are subject to doubt.
Are There Different Types of Female Orgasm? [Link]
This is based on analysis of a questionnaire that 1) did not include physical verification for the women’s claims about how the event they describes as “orgasm” was achieved or what the physical reality of that event was, and 2) did not make a distinction between intercourse with ancillary clitoral grinding vs. intercourse with no ancillary clitoral stimulation. These results are an interesting look into how women describe a thing that they call orgasm, but that is it. It is not certain that experiences these women are speaking of have anything to do with each other in a physical sense, and if the scientific community is going to accept that anything any woman says is an orgasm should be defined as an orgasm, I would think that to be incredibly confusing and problematic for getting any kind of meaningful understanding about female sexual response.
Genetic influences on variation in female orgasmic function: a twin study [Link]
This study indicates, using a traditional twin study questionnaire, that the variability in the ability to orgasm for women may be somewhere between 34 and 45% due to genetics. This is due to the fact that genetically identical twins answered questions about their ability to orgasm through masturbation and through intercourse more alike than sets of non-identical twins. As the authors say, this might be due to genetic qualities of the genitals or hormones or it might have to do with things like depression and temperament, so it’s an interesting angle to investigate further. However, I’m not sure what it’s supposed to convince me of in relation to psychology and/or social elements changing the meaning of orgasm.
M&J took pains, several times, to spell out the importance of non-physical factors and influences: the psychosocial. To wit,A detailed psychosocial study of the research population cannot be presented within the framework of this text. Yet neither this book nor this chapter can be considered complete without emphasizing an acute awareness of the vital, certainly the primary influence, exerted by psychosocial factors upon human sexuality, particularly that of orgasmic attainment of the female. . . .physiologic detail is of value only when considered in relation to [behavioral theory and sociologic concept].M&J are saying that the physical signs are correlative indicators of orgasm, not that they literally are orgasm themselves. If you believe M&J is the “gold standard” (I would not recommend it), you should accept their contention that physiology is not the definition of orgasm.
What M&J are saying there is that social and physiological aspects are incredibly important to human sexuality and to the attainment of female orgasm – meaning the female’s ability to get to the point of having those muscle spasms we call orgasm. I would agree. In Human Sexual Inadequacy, their book describing research into therapy for sexual dysfunction, they were clear that arousal and orgasm are basic functions of the human body, but that psycho-social factors can easily put a stop to the physiological progression of sexual response. They were, as am I, quite aware that orgasm is attained and experienced through a filter of infinitely diverse psycho-social variables, but beyond “orgasmic attainment” there is an objective physiological aspect that is the physiologic orgasm. If you want to call that merely the indicator of an orgasm, I’m okay with that. I would call the blockage of oxygen rich blood to a section of heart muscle a heart attack. However, I’m okay with you calling it an indicator of a heart attack, given all the psycho-social elements that go into the lead up it
Asserting that it is of critical importance to one’s sexual experience the fact of whether the key sensors are in the vaginal tissue, or a couple centimeters away in the clitoral body that can often be smashed against it during penetrative intercourse, strikes me as pedantic and a little silly.
For the record, I don’t and wouldn’t argue whether the key sensors are in the vaginal tissue, clitoral legs sitting close to and being smashed by a penetrated vagina, nor even in the prostate tissue. I would argue they are on none of those and as yet have only been proved to be in and around the clitoral glans. However, if we do find that something within the vagina which seems to trigger orgasm also, I think it is absolutely of scientific import to clearly understand what the mechanism and what the key sensors are. I also think it is of personal import for many people, because knowing what the mechanism is can help people describe and teach how to attain orgasm this way.
Cited
1. Buisson, O., Foldes, P., Jannini, E., & Mimoun, S. (2010). Coitus as revealed by ultrasound in one volunteer couple. The journal of sexual medicine, 7(8), 2750-2754.
2. Barry R. Komisaruk, Beverly Whipple, Audrita Crawford, Sherry Grimes, Wen-Ching Liu, Andrew Kalnin, Kristine Mosier, 2004. Brain activation during vaginocervical self-stimulation and orgasm in women with complete spinal cord injury: fMRI evidence of mediation by the Vagus nerves, Brain Research, Volume 1024, Issues 1–2, 22. Pages 77-88.
3. Carmichael MS. Relationships among cardiovascular, muscular, and oxytocin responses during human sexual activity. Arch Sex Behav. 1994 Feb;23(1):59-79.
4. Catania L. Pleasure and orgasm in women with Female Genital Mutilation/Cutting (FGM/C). J Sex Med. 2007 Nov;4(6):1666-78.
5. Fazari AB et al. Reconstructive surgery for female genital mutilation starts sexual functioning in Sudanese woman: a case report. J Sex Med. 2013 Nov;10(11):2861-5
3. Carmichael MS. Relationships among cardiovascular, muscular, and oxytocin responses during human sexual activity. Arch Sex Behav. 1994 Feb;23(1):59-79.
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