5 Comedies My Dad Would Be Into #DirectedByWomen

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I'm saying this a lot lately, but I apologize for the almost month delay in the posts. I was already a bit behind, and then my dad got sick, so I traveled back to Indy and have been living at my sister's house. I've certainly gone through the whole hospital/doctor/grave diagnosis thing before but this is the first time anything has happened to my dad since my mom passed. It's just me and my sister now, and it's just a lot of things to do and places to be. People in the hospital system need an advocate with them - at least that's my take after many a time being with a patient going through it. There are great people in healthcare but a lot of the time there are just systematic breaks in communication and a lot to think about and remember, and frankly a sick person isn't the best person to be there for themselves. Plus, we both want to be with my dad and make sure he's not feeling alone thorugh as much of this process as we can be. All that to say, that's my priority at the moment. Well that and ya know, work, but also, I want to keep up on this blog and let it be known I'm still at it. 

So, as I often do I'm going for a quick post, and as you might have noticed, the 5 Movies series is a fairly easy one for me to get up, so here we are. That said, I also really like this series because I LOVE movies and I truly believe in getting a variety of lady voices behind our media.

Okay, so to the movies. I wanted to do a list dedicated to my dad, and frankly my first choice at this point in his life would be Westerns - because I don't know, he's a 70 year old man that doesn't have cable and watches mostly the Grit station. However, not a lot of old Westerns in my list for various reasons including that I don't watch them, and there weren't a ton of women directing them back in the day. My second choice, for dad, would be comedies - because my dad sure do be loving a comedy.  So that's where I landed. These are 5 Comedic movies directed by women that I have actually seen and that I believe or know my dad would like.

A Little History of These Lists

I started doing this categorized List of 5 movies thing where I showcase movies that were directed by women and that I have actually seen. It all started during the Directed By Women Worldwide Viewing Party in September 2015, and it was pretty fun, so I've continued doing it from time to time.

It's a bit off-topic from my normal fare, ya know, being that it's not specifically about lady-gasms or anything like that, but I think it fits the blog because
1. this blog is also about indie movie-making, and
2. this blog is partially about getting the female perspective of sexuality into our media. So, to me, supporting female voices in our media  means we're creating more room for female voices to speak on all types of things, which sometimes will be sex, orgasms, and sexuality.

You can find all my 5-movie lists HERE.

So, here friends, are 5 Comedies directed by women that my dad would like (and that I've actually seen). I had to go back and pull some that I've already posted about because my current list of options I haven't yet written about is a little light on this type of movie. 

So, like ol' dad might have done back in the day - order an Aunt Polly's pizza, get a generic cola from Marsh, make some jiffy pop, and laugh your ass off to these movies.

The Movies

1 Fast Times at Ridgemont High - This was directed by Amy Heckerling.  I saw this on TV at some point in my youth with my sister. I kinda think we were babysitting together somewhere and the kids were asleep, although we didn't babysit together much. Anyway, it seemed cool and funny and super edgy, which I liked, and I watched it later as an adult, and knew the actors better, so that was fun - and I did an SSL Review in 2010 about the dugout sex. Also, I can't be certain my dad would like this, it was after his time, but he likes generally this kind of stuff, so I'm going with it.

2 Shrek- This was directed by Andrew Adamson and Vicki Jenson - I saw this in the theater with some of my nieces and/or nephews. I honestly can't remember which ones, but it was 2011, so it had to have been the older ones. Anyway, I liked it and thought it was a solid kids movie. Top notch really. My dad does indeed like this one. I know that for certain. It's his level of dumb comedy.

  

3 Speed Racer - This was directed by Lana and Lilly Wachowski. I also saw this at the theater with Charlie, and I think Barnaby. I thought it was done really well, and thinking about it it makes me want to watch it again. Anyway, my dad liked the Speed Racer cartoon, and I believe he liked this revamp of  it.

4 Wayne's World  -This was directed by Penelope Spheeris. I think I first saw this on VHS with my BFF Leslie. We were already fans of the Wayne's World SNL skit, so, obviously we loved it, and I also believe I had the Soundtrack tape for it. My dad liked it too I believe - mostly because it's dumb. 

5 National Lampoon's European Vacation - This was also directed by Amy Heckerling. I definitely first say this in my childhood living room on VHS. I believe that there was another family there with us when we were watching it, but honestly that seems weird because we had a tiny living room, and I don't remember having other families over to do things like watch movies, but I also kinda feel like it was our across the street neighbors who had the exact same size living room, so maybe it was fine and we were all used to being packed in tight. The thing I most remember about this movie, though was when the German gal exposes her boobs to the son in this. It was reeeaaal dirty, and I was into it. My dad would clearly love this because it's the people and comedy of his era and all that. It's his vibe for sure.

Inside Amy Schumer - S2 Ep1

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Inside Amy Schumer 
This show makes me laugh, and here's the best part - Amy Schumer tends to bring it when it comes to realism and female sexuality. She brought it in her movie Trainwreck, in The Joe Rogan Podcast, and largely in the other episodes of this show I've SSL Reviewed so far. She has shown a strong willingness to give the clit the glory it deserves, speak some truths about lady sex experiences, rep for actual lady-gasms - all things largely absent in media and also incredibly important to Orgasm Equality. (She could use some schooling and humbling when it comes to speaking about race though - but that's pretty true of a lot of us).

The SSL Reviewable
There is plenty to SSL Review in this show. And for those that don't yet know, an SSL Review is a critique specifically of discussions or depictions of female orgasm, female masturbation, or the clit. I focus on that and really only that (unless I want to talk about something else). I'm looking mainly at realism and about how the depiction/discussion plays in the larger cultural conversation about female orgasm and women's sexuality.

Please, my friends, do enjoy more SSL Reviews for MOVIES and TV SHOWS.

The SSL Review

Season 2 Episode 1: A Car Accident

The end of almost all Inside Amy Schumer shows is her doing a piece of her stand-up to a small crowd. That's where we are for this first SSL Review.

She's telling the crowd that she's jealous of how dudes get to come. It seems fun...and not just because they get to spread their funfetti around. She pantomimes dude spreading their cum around like Oprah giving away free cars. No, it's because they're so ridiculously tired, satisfied, and disoriented after - like they were just in a car accident or something.

Then she ends with, "We're not like that. I need more recovery time after a sneeze than an orgasm." 

My Comments

First off, I just want to mention that clearly her saying this is funnier than reading my description of her saying it. That's a given. Well... I guess I can think of one incident where hearing a detailed description of a thing was way better than the thing itself - and that was when Tosh.0 gave a 25 minute detailed explanation of the movie Human Centipede. I can only find abridged versions of this now, but if you find the full version, I recommend that over the actual movie.

Anyway, Amy's saying this. She's got gestures and an attitude, and it works for humor. I like the visual of calling dudes ejaculating 'spreading their funfetti.' It's good for a laugh. However, I think if you get to the kernel of this bit, it doesn't hold up for me as the kind of humor-through-hard-truth-telling that really excites me about some of Amy's lady-related sex comedy. She's basically coming at this from - 'dudes get all tired/satisfied after an orgasm and women don't.' To me that kernel doesn't feel necessarily true. I mean I feel like a good orgasm can make a lady just wanna flop down and lay there for a while, ya know. 

Also...it's kind of a tired, not-that-perceptive premise for talking about differences  between men and women during sex. I feel like I've heard it a lot. I remember a bit I saw some comic do a while ago...I feel like it was Chris Rock, but I'm not sure...about how men fall asleep after an orgasm and women get more activated and start bouncing off walls and shit. Louis C.K. also did a bit where he basically said that men go to sleep and women don't after sex because men actually came and women didn't. I mean he actually never used the word come, he instead speaks about it in terms of women not being 'fucked well' enough to satisfy them - which is of course problematic because 'fucking' a woman is not what she needs anyway. Vag-banging ain't gonna get her there. A lady actually needs clit stimulation to come, and C.K. completely misses that point. However, his basic premise that women don't get all drowsy and shit after sex like men do because they are actually not physically satiated  (i.e. they didn't actually come) is not wrong. And, it seems to me a bit more in the humor-through-hard-truth-telling realm than Amy's kind of generic dudes-get-all-tired-satisfied-after-an-orgasm-and-women-don't-and-I'm-jealous thing.  

All that to say, I feel like Amy's whole joke here was funny on the surface, and thus not unsuccessful, but also it was kinda stale in that it played on old stereotypes about female sexuality without criticizing or more deeply examining those. I mean, it seems to me that it's worth considering that if a woman isn't as tired-disoriented after her 'orgasm' as her male partner is, then maybe she didn't actually orgasm. Maybe she just faked it or had intercourse (a thing people still very wrongly use interchangeably with 'had an orgasm') and just didn't come. Like, maybe there's a stereotype of women not acting satiated after sex or "having an orgasm" because lots of times ladies literally are not satiated. They didn't come and their male partner did...maybe that's why they seem to act different after. I feel like Amy missed her opportunity to dig into that. And by not digging into that, in essence she reiterated the pretty incorrect idea that women's orgasms are somehow intrinsically different than men's, and completely ignored what I think would be a pretty humor-through-hard-truth-telling avenue of pointing out why that stereotype exists in the first place.

But that's just, like, my opinion, man. Humor is a tricky thing, and I'm being picky. Picky because I respect her comedic work generally on these topics, so really it's just a loving critique to a person who in general does a fab-ass job with this kind of shit. And that's what SSL Reviews are about anyway - being uber-critical...because someone has to be.

The Vulva Rating
So, there is nothing revolutionary or progressive about Amy's joke. In fact it kind of bolstered the idea that women and men are naturally, physically different when it comes to orgasms. At the same time, it's also just neutral. It plays off a tired old stereotype, yet doesn't really make it any worse with extra inaccuracies or anything. It just doesn't question and dissect the stereotype, which does inadvertently reiterate it, but also....what I'm asking is a lot to ask someone to do every time she speaks of lady sex stuff. She does it well most of the time, and I'm heavily appreciative.

So, I'm going to stick to a very neutral 3 out of 5 vulva rating for this episode.

(!)(!)(!)

Bridget Everett - Puttin' Dicks Away For Orgasm Equality

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At the end of Amy Schumer's last episode of Season 3, there was an absolutely spectacular celebration of female-centered sexuality by comedian Bridget Everett called, I believe, Put Your Dick Away. And, I'm going to go further and tell you that it's straight up revolutionary shit she's doing. I'm adding her directly into my Orgasm Equality Hero list - because she deserves it.

Bridget Everett

The beautiful part is that it was funny as shit too. Like I'm always saying, truly lady-based sexual humor is a largely untapped area of comedy. Although talking about sex is nothing new for the ladies, strangely, talking about hetero sex in a truly selfish yet horn-ified way and keeping it clit instead of vagina centric is still super shocking and edgy...In a way it's really that women talking about sex that truly uses men is still really wild and scary (and btw - comedy about making a man fuck an insatiable vagina until he's tired out doesn't count - that's like saying you're 'using' your friend by obsessively cleaning their house to fulfill your cleaning fetish until they're kinda bored of you being around their house).

Can I just say again that I LOVED this goddamn Put Your Dick Away song. It was so on-point, funny, and deeply true - as some of the best comedy is. I really find it exciting to see more and more comedians expressing in this way about sex and masturbation.  Amy Schumer's got the triple crown of 5 vulva ratings in podcasts, TV and Movies, so she is doing her part. The ladies of Saturday Night Live are tappin' in from time to time. Margret Cho did her part back in the day (although I think the world wasn't quite ready yet). Of course they're others too -add 'em in the comments if you got 'em.

So, here's my favorite set of lyrics. It brings a little revolutionary tear to my eye.

When I come home at the end of the day and my fingers are down to the bone. 
My back is achin' don't there be no mistaken, I'm gonna call my girl on the phone.
Then I'll pour a glass of wine. I'm gonna take my time. I'm gonna get my shit relaxed.
And when I say it's fucking time, you're gonna lick my valentine, and don't forget the crack. 
So put yoooooour diiiick, puuuuuut your diiiiick, put your dick away.

Indeed.

Anyway, I think humor is probably the best path to Orgasm Equality. For instance: Some dudes don't want to believe that you might GREATLY prefer for them to mouth-fuck your clit instead of gettin' that dick up in it, but if they hear it as a joke, it lubes the idea up just enough to slip it in the back door...just enough to wonder about if the next girl they hook up with even actually cares to see or touch his junk at all. The way I see it, if we ever want orgasm equality guys need go into a sexual encounter just as worried about the possibility that they'll be used for their mouth and sent on their way as women are about getting a terrible, orgasm-less bang. We are not to that point yet. I mean guys pretty much assume an orgasm in any  sexual situation, so we do have a long way to go yet. But one day, with everyone equally scared they could end up giving more than they get, maybe everyone will start putting in equal effort, and orgasmic joy will reign on earth - amiright?

But seriously, check this woman out. There's no official video of this song up on YouTube that I can find. So you're just going to have to watch her on Inside Amy Schumer S3 E10 (3 Buttholes) or watch her recent Stand-up (which I'm gonna do tonight). Do it.