It's time for more Random Hite Report. In 1976, Shere Hite dropped The Hite Report where she compiled detailed survey answers from over 3,000 women about sex, masturbation, orgasms, and relationships. It's insane to me how revolutionary this book still is. Read it, seriously. We haven't changed that much. Then in 1981, she dropped The Hite Report on Male Sexuality where over 7,000 men give detailed answers about sex, relationships, and women. It too is revolutionary, and the honesty and detail in this book is so important and moving, I think everyone should read this too.
So, I give you a taste every now and then to entice you to get these books (seriously, they are both like 1 cent online) what I do is flip to one random page and copy the contents of that page, no more-no less, directly onto this blog. Enjoy.
The Hite Report on Male Sexuality
Knopf, 1981 pg 431
This is from the chapter Toward a New Idea of Intercourse. In the section "Stereotypes about intercourse." These are answers to the survey question : "Do you have your best orgasms during fellatio, masturbation, intercourse or some other activity? Which activity do you find overall the most enjoyable?"
"My best orgasms have been from masturbation with intercourse a close second. This is due to the refined techniques I need for which most women do not have the patience, skill, or interest."
"In masturbation the pleasure is more intense, as I am concentrating a good deal more on my own pleasure, that little ol' button-pusher, me. My best orgasms have always been privately conceived."
"The joys of masturbating a cock allow you many alternatives, you can develop a technique that allows you to give yourself all sorts of good feelings. In fucking you ejaculate because the head of the cock is stimulated by moving back and forth in a vagina. There is no change in pressure, no bending, and movement is slower than the hand or head-you don't have the variety. But when you masturbate you can grab the cock in many different ways, with many different pressures, you can slide your hand over the head for one sensation, or you can use the skin that forms a movable sheath over the head for another. It gives me the opportunity to enjoy many sensations missed in fucking. Masturbating gives me my greatest orgasms."
"Mi best orgasms are masturbation with simultaneous rectal stimulation by penis or dildo."
"The stimulation during masturbation is more concise; also I can fantasize during masturbation. the vagina actually is not much stimulation for me. Then too I don't have to worry about satisfying her. I can be selfish. If I try to cross over to the masturbation habits in lovemaking, I'm going to be a bad lovemaker because I'll just be trying to get my rocks off. I love the initial penetration into the vagina, but it's just not enough friction. Probably because I'm so used to masturbating."*
"I have two distinctly different types of orgasm. One is produced bu penis-vagina intercourse, the other by masturbation. My first and favorite type of orgasm is produced by masturbating with anal penetration which results in a very different build-up and climax. The entire process is less frenzied, less penis-centered. The sensations are less localized, more diffuse, I feel sensations in my nipples, my inner thighs, the soles of my feet more intensely, and throughout the buildup, rather than only transiently as in the 'usual' thrusting orgasm buildup, where they are quickly overwhelmed by penis sensation. the climax too feels more global, less acute, and it's sensation is one of sweet, wonderful melting, suffusing out from the genitals."
"I would like to differentiate between the kind of orgasm I feel when I'm masturbating versus the kind of orgasm I have when I'm having vaginal intercourse. When I'm masturbating I usually have a very strong orgasm. Also, I can have several mini-orgasms (orgasms with contractions but without ejaculation) before I finally want to have the ejaculatory orgasm. I've rarely had those kinds of min-orgasms in vaginal intercourse. I can't control it that closely. Also, if I'm masturbating I can feel all the accessory organs - the prostate, the urethra bulb, all those contracting. In the penis itself I can feel the muscles contracting. When...
*This statement somewhat parallels women's fears that possibly they couldn't orgasm during intercourse because the had masturbated too much or too well. See chapter 3 of The Hite Report on female sexuality to see why just the opposite is true.
Fascinating!
ReplyDeleteI have certainly heard of the Hite Report but never read it.
The particular page you chose to share was startling to me. I would have never in a million years guessed that anyone had better orgasms mastubating than in sexual intercourse. I don't disbelieve the people who reported this but it does surprise the hell out of me.
Solo sex has never been as good for me as two-party sex. Nothing makes me hornier than seeing that I am successfully driving my sex partner stark, raving bonkers.
My best orgasms always follow on the heels of reducing my sex partner to mush.
Oh man, you should check out both the male and female Hite Report. I think hearing all those men and women speak in such detail about such intimate parts of their lives is just really intriguing. I also think the male one has a special kind of allure to me because these are men of all ages from a particular period in history. These are men who are trying to traverse the quickly changing landscape of marriage and relationships with females just at the popular height of the women's movement and sexual revolution. It's super interesting to me.
DeleteAs for masturbation giving better orgasms than partner sex, that's certainly not what everyone says in these books, but it's not an uncommon response at all in either the male or the female response. If I were to make a generalization - I'd say it is pretty common in these books for people answering these questions to give a sense that the overall feelings of sex with another person is the best, but the actual intensity of the orgasm is often best when he/she is in charge of his/her own stimulation. Again, plenty of answers that differ from that, but it was a common theme.