Hello, friends. It's time for more Random Hite Report. In 1976, Shere Hite dropped The Hite Report where she compiled detailed survey answers from over 3,000 women about sex, masturbation, orgasms, and relationships. It's insane to me how revolutionary this book still is. Read it, seriously. We haven't changed that much. Then in 1981, she dropped The Hite Report on Male Sexuality where she over 7,000 men give detailed answers about sex, relationships, and women. It too is revolutionary, and the honesty and detail in this book is so important and moving, I think everyone should read this too.
So, I give you a taste every now and then to entice you to get these books. Seriously, they are both like 1 cent online. Anyway, what I do is flip to one random page and copy the contents of that page, no more-no less, directly onto this blog. Enjoy.
The Hite Report on Male Sexuality
Knopf, 1981
pg 909
This is from the chapter Thirty Men Speak About Their Lives. In this chapter, long excerpts from each of 30 different respondents are set out for us. Shere Hite chose these because they were "some of the most interesting and emotionally involving material received and show the range and variety of points of view expressed." So, the following passage is from one of those 30 men.
...was doing it, I was trying to make sure I was doing it right. But the thing that was really exciting was that she showed me exactly what to do-that meant she was very excited too, excited enough to want me to do it to her. It made me feel really close to her and special because nobody ever did that before-really intimate, because I always thought of masturbation as a very private thing. If she wanted me to masturbate her, that seemed really private. I felt, how could we be any closer?
Men never talk about masturbating women, at least I've never heard them talk about it. They talk about women masturbating them a lot, but they never talk about themselves masturbating women, or there being thirty-two different ways women masturbate! And i didn't even know one. I thought women masturbated by putting something inside. Masturbation had still for me a real pejorative context, like it's not the real thing, or that's just what women do when they don't have a man. A frustrated women would just want to stick something in here, I thought, but it could never be as good a s a cock. i guess that's why men think that a woman needs a man, that she could never masturbate herself as well as a man could-I've heard that so many times. But really, a woman can just put a vibrator or her hand on her mons and just come and come and come.
Anyway, getting back to the first time I gave her clitoral stimulation, after a while when I kept trying, she was really excited and breathing heavy, her whole body was tensing up with her legs tight together and straight out-and then she got really tense and tight and moaned and held herself like that for a few minutes. Then she told me she came. It was a revelation for me.
Of all the things we had done before that-like when we were kissing and I could her moaning, her head is right by my ear sometimes, and I'm listening and I can feel her breathing-never was it that exciting, it was so thrilling during her orgasm. I felt like she was really strong! That was my reaction to the whole thing-that she had a tremendous strength- a really powerful energy that was inside her. Also, I felt really small next to her when she had an orgasm and I didn't!
I also felt like-well, I used to believe that the idea was to fuck until you both had orgasms together, but all of the sudden I realized it was a really good feeling to enjoy someone else's orgasm, even if I didn't have one. Plus, to discover that she could have one that made me envious-plus I think she had another one about a minute later-well, I was really amazed! Later, after we did it a lot, I really got to enjoy it. She feels energetic and powerful and independent when she orgasms, and it makes me feel good to be next to someone so strong and active and alive.
Do you know the difference between being next to a really passive person and someone that's really excited? It makes me feel great, it makes me feel really excited, aroused, like having orgasms, really strong, it makes me feel like an animal. I just want to hop on and screw her at that point and I often do.
But I consider me masturbating her one of the major things that we do. I don't consider it a warm up thing. Sometimes when we don't do it I miss doing it. Sometimes she's said things to me while I'm doing it that make me feel really good, or really hot. I get sweaty when I'm doing it, and I like that feeling a lot...
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