So I missed Lady Porn Day. Apparently it's February 22nd, and since I feel like it's too late now to wait till next year, I'll just talk about it today. It was started by Rachel Rabbit White where she writes
At it’s heart, this is about celebrating pornography and masturbation. It is an opportunity for ladies of all genders (or however you identify) to open up a dialog: What is feminist porn? What is your history with porn? What do you find hot?
Very good. I like the idea of women openly talking about porn. It's complicated and deep inside of us (no pun intended), and important to orgasm equality. We need to begin considering more publicly our wants and needs in regard to porn.
It is an intriguing media, and for most of us, it was/is an important detailed, what-goes-where kind of education about sexual encounters...the kind that you otherwise only get from real encounters. It is also way too male-fantasy heavy and way too actual female orgasm light - way, way, way too light. Also, it can be (is likely) an incredibly bad miseducation, but you know what, it's been a fucking hot part of my orgasmic history. It's also been really disappointing at times. In fact, back in the very early 2000's, the realization that some big fantasy situations that I wanted to see in porn were not around much (sexy lady-junk focused MMF porn for instance), and the certain and increasingly undesirable cum-on-face ending to every single porn (I actually thought it was hot at first - really) was a main reason I got the idea for working on Science, Sex and the Ladies. It's not one thing, that crazy ol' porn, and through all the bad parts and the very real criticisms I believe it deserves, I have and continue to partake. I love watching shit that is so very not what I want done to me in real life. I like some nasty nast, ya'll. That's just how it is, and I think think I'm not alone.
It's just fantasy, but it's also very much more than that. We ladies have a relationship with porn that needs more attention, and so if you write, maybe go write about it. If you have friends, talk about it, if you don't like bringing up porn randomly in polite company, then do some soul-searching about it.
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