SSL Play Review? Don We Now our Gay Apparel

Well who knew I'd SSL Review a play, and more importantly, who knew anyone actually read my blog and would ask me to do so? Being that I was excited for a new blogging endeavor, and that our own Science Sex and the Ladies actor Dave Charles was cast in this play, I decided to check out Don We Now Our Gay Apparel at Indy's own Theatre on the Square. You too can check it out thru December 18th. (P.S. I love that you can take the beer, wine, and snacks from concessions into the play with you at this theatre.)

If you love sparkly things, 3 saucy singing drag queens ( from Orient Bar), and raunchy Christmas humor, then this is the show to see (if you don't - then go check out Handel's Messiah at Clowes Hall for your Christmas entertainment instead). Charlie and I both thoroughly enjoyed the show, and on a side note, were impressed at the up to the minute jokes. For instance, the Glee parody referenced the recent revelation that Rachel cheated on Finn - OMG. The Glee parody was pretty dead on in a lot of ways, and if you watch Glee, you gotta love that part. My only problem was that for about 5 minutes I thought the person playing Sue Sylvester, the abrasive cheer coach, was supposed to be Sam Evans, the pretty little blond boy. This reminded me of an article I read in Bitch Magazine about the Justin Bieber haircut also being a lesbian hair icon. Without the obvious difference in height - a Sue Sylvester wig looks too much like a Justin Bieber-ish teenage boy - that's all I'm sayin.

Here are a few of my favorite whacky-ass highlights that I'd like to point out.

Niki Hurrle Warner as the Anna Nicole Smith Angel in the manger  - well done you drunkin whore! (A strong second place in that scene goes to Dave Charle's long beautiful Joseph hair).
Jay White as the oddly terrorized Grinche. He also did a superb toddler excited for Christmas.
Fairah Flame, Ian Cruz and Thomas Turner as The Three Queens of Orient Bar were fab throughout - but it was their songs that stole the show - they had strong voices, wicked confidence, and sassified-ness that rocked the house. (By the way this was an ensemble cast, and their specific parts were not listed in the program so I had to do some Googling to match the faces with the names - if I'm wrong let me know.)

Now...this is an SSL review and, as of course we all know, SSL reviews are reserved only for pieces of entertainment that depict or specifically discuss female sexual functioning and pleasure. Technically, this play didn't do that. However, it did have a vagina song sing-off between 3 drag queens and 3 female Christmas icons - using familiar Christmas tunes - that ended in a full cast rendition of  "My Vagina" to the tune of the Hallelujah Chorus. That's pretty epic, so I'm accepting this as an honorary SSL reviewable piece. Normally the discussion of how the piece depicts female sexual functioning is larger than the general review of the piece as a whole, but that will be opposite today. I will only mention one thing. People, the vagina is just a muscle that babies come out, cylindrical things go in, and blood drips from occasionally. Okay, it's more than that - especially metaphorically, but my point is that it ain't all that. It doesn't have but a few nerve endings in it ( and thank God for that when a baby is ripping through it). We're always talking about the vagina, but it's the most boring utilitarian thing we got down there. If we're gonna sing a Hallelujah Chorus to a part of our lady junk, for god's sake let it be the clit. That's where orgasms (all of them - watch this movie I'm making) come from - not the lame-o vagina. Just a thought for next year's play...

This play gets 4 vulvas....for being fabulous.
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  1. Thank you for this! I'm going to make sure the cast sees this. Haha the Glee revelation about Rachel cheating on Finn? I can take credit for that since it was definitely an ad lib for that night because I just seen my first full episode of Glee. Thank you for noticing. Also, thanks for the hair compliment. I'm just vain enough to really appreciate it.

  2. Thanks for leaving a comment David - I love comments! And seriously, you have great hair. Also I didn't want to seem like I was favoring you too much, but I also thought you did an excellent Marley (I think that's the right name) in the Christmas Carol part. Keep us updated about your work.