4.19.2012

Ladies, Stop Poo-pooing "Metrosexually" Styled Men



Brad Pitt - Keepin' it tight for the ladies
Honestly ladies, you're killin' me here. Can we stop encouraging men to be unstylish, unkempt, slobs? Can we stop equating that sort of thing with manliness? Men have a long history of putting time into their appearance from the powdered wigs of yesteryear to the perfectly combed hair of the 50's. It's not like wanting to look good is some kind of terrifying new endeavor of the modern male. So, why, I ask, why do I hear women all the time saying things like, "Ew - he's too metrosexual for my taste." or "Call me old fashioned, but I don't want a guy that spends more time in the bathroom than I do." or "I like my men to be like men."

 Do you know what you're doing? Do you understand that every time you say, "He's too pretty," you are simultaneously discouraging men from trying  to look good and telling them that we actually want them to look like crap. I know. I know. Women just want them to look like men, right - they can still look good, right?

I don't buy that crap. Regardless of what a particular lady means when she says something like that, those types of statements in general insinuate that the very act of caring what one looks like is somehow un-masculine.  A real man is natural. They don't try too hard. They don't worry about wearing clothes that fit their body well. They shouldn't even worry too much about keeping a tight body - real men eat whatever they want, right? They shouldn't take time to make sure they have a stylish haircut, glasses, clothes, and shoes. They shouldn't try to look attractive.


So women are supposed to like men in the natural form, but men are supposed to like something a touch more high-maintenance than a "natural woman." When we say a woman should look like a woman, we don't mean that she should have hairy armpits, wild eyebrows, a touch of a feathery mustache, big drooping boobs, sans make-up'd face, all while hiding her well-worn maternal body under a big non-form fitting dress. For real - that is all part of the natural female, but that ain't what "being like a woman" is. No sir - we mean that she should have a high lifting bra, a cute haircut, at least a touch of enhancing make-up, a shaven and plucked body, and clothes that fit attractively around her waist, hips, and bust. To say it simply, she should try to look attractive.

Now, I'm of the mind that a little decorative sprucing up is good. I think it's human nature to want to take time to look good for the people we desire. That sprucing up is what helps the people we desire, desire us back. I just don't think it should be categorized as unmanly or feminine. So, do I want a man that spends 2 hours getting ready in the morning, who's absolutely obsessed with his looks? No, but I don't even want a gal friend like that. It's a ridiculous way to be, but equating that kind of behavior to a man that simply takes the time to make his hair look nice, smells good, and wears smart looking, nicely fitted clothes, is also ridiculous.

I want to say this in no uncertain terms. I am attracted to men who put a little effort into their looks when they go out. Why? Because unless you're Brad Pit or Mila Kunis, you look hotter if you put some effort in (and to be honest that's actually a big reason they are so unreasonably hot). There's no shame in that game.

Why is it so crazy for a man to admit to primping a bit and for a woman to admit that she likes to see the results. You know the saying about women liking men in uniform? I think what women really like is that usually men in uniform are fit, well groomed men who are wearing nice clothing tailored to their body. They look...well, like they care. Plus, we can see the outline of their bodies. We ladies like to see that kind of thing too.

I'm just saying, I think women really do think a guy who tries is sexy. We just don't feel comfortable admitting it, and I think guys really do want to be sexy. They just feel awkward making the attempt, and women are often the ones making it seem like the attempt's not worth their effort. For the love of god ladies, please don't stifle men's interest in being sexy. For once I'd like to go out to a store, or a bar, or really just even to work and see the ratio of attractive men come close to the ratio of attractive women. We can do it ladies, just be bold and express your desires!

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