Almost Christmas - The SSL Review

Almost Christmas
I love Christmas movies, and I ain't ashamed of it. I will watch them all. I will watch the Hallmark made for TV Christmas movies and complain the whole damn time that they made a Christmas movie and didn't even take the damn time to deck all their shit out with Christmas. Give me tinsel and garland and trees and lights and all that. I am thirsty for it. Anyway, like I said, I will watch them all, but I LOVE a sweet and well made one. So, lucky me, I spent the night at my sister's this Christmas Eve, and after all her kids went to bed, and Charlie headed home, and my dear, dear brother-in-law fell asleep like a rock on the couch next to us (seriously, this man sleeps harder than any person I've ever met. My sister and I broke a window once trying to wake this man up when we locked ourselves out of their house. He wasn't even drunk or anything. He never woke up - I mean he did. He's alive, but it was the next morning). So all that to say, me and my sister got to hang out alone Christmas Eve night with our hot beverages, Christmas treats and Santa related business. It was fab, and the icing on the cake was that my sister had just recently seen Almost Christmas and wanted to watch it again. It had not been on my radar, and I was very pleasantly surprised. It was just what I wanted. PLUS. Mo'Nique is in this. I love this woman. My sister introduced me to her stand-up years and years agao, and we've been fans for a long time. And, this woman can bring the acting as well. Frankly, she is a joy to watch in whatever she does. She also made a movie several years ago call Phat Girlz, which is, yes, quite low budgety, but I really loved.

Why I'm blogging about this is because there was a very small line in this movie that made it SSL Reviewable. Okay, for those not yet in the know. An SSL Review is a critique of depictions or discussions of female masturbation, female orgasm, or the clit. I only discuss those scenes - not the movie as a whole (unless I feel like talking about more), and I try to focus on the realism of the depiction/discussion and also how it fits into a larger cultural discussion of female orgasm and sexuality.

Check all the SSL Review movies HERE and TV SSL Reviews HERE.

The Scene
This is one of the more simple and easy SSL Reviews I have done, and it will get a good Vulva Rating as well. So, this movie is a classic family-gets-together-for-the-holidays-and-tries-to-get-along story. Mo'Nique is the aunt who loves them all, but tells 'em straight. She's a back-up singer and has worked with all the greats. She's fabulous and has a new wig in almost every scene. The youngest, college age, son has a friend (Eric) that has a huge crush on her, and he's always trying to give her a line or something.

At one point the family, along with this friend, Eric, are out playing football, and some of the older folk are watching on the sidelines. So Eric gives her some eyes from the field, and the others on the side line comment about him liking her to whcih she replies, "I've got vibrators older than that child."

The SSL Review
I mean, this wasn't directly a discussion of female masturbation, but it was an insinuation of it, and I count that as SSL Review eligible. I mean, there's not a lot to say here except that any time a woman in a mainstream movie lets us know that she masturbates, and there isn't also a demonization of it, it helps to normalize the idea that women are desiring, sexual people capable of and possessing the right to touch their nether regions and bring themselves, by themselves to orgasm.

We need more of that because frankly, the norms of male-female sexual interaction focus on P-in-V intercourse which, contrary to popular belief, is a completely shit way for women to get an orgasm....so we ladies, as well as our partners, need to be comfortable with and willing to include female masturbation into the sex act if we ladies are going to have any hope of coming as regularly as men do during sex.

Thus, this lovely Christmas movie gets a solid 4 vulva rating from me.


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