Hello, friends. It's time for more Random Hite Report! In 1976, Shere Hite dropped The Hite Report where she compiled detailed survey answers from over 3,000 women about sex, masturbation, orgasms, and relationships. It's insane to me how revolutionary this book still is. Read it, seriously. We really haven't changed that much in 40 years, and it's an incredibly insightful read.
Then in 1981, she dropped The Hite Report on Male Sexuality where over 7,000 men give detailed answers about sex, relationships, and women. It too is revolutionary, and the honesty, vulnerability, and detail in this book is so important and moving. I think everyone should read this too. So, I give you a taste every now and then to entice you to get these books. Seriously, they are both like 1 cent online.
Anyway, what I do is flip to one random page and copy the contents of that page, no more-no less, directly onto this blog. Enjoy.
The Hite Report on Male Sexuality
Knopf, 1981 pg 909
The following is in the chapter Thirty Men Speak About Their Lives. These are longer excerpts from men's answers chosen simply because the author thought they were some of the most interesting and emotionally involved material.
...was doing it, I was trying to make sure I was doing it right. But the thing that was really exciting was that she showed me exactly what to do-that meant she was very excited too, excited enough to want me to do it to her. It made me feel really close to her and special since nobody ever did that before-really intimate, because I always thought of masturbation as a very private thing. If she wanted me to masturbate her, that seemed really private. I felt, how could we be any closer?
Men never talk about masturbating women, at least I've never heard them talk about it. They talk about women masturbating them a lot, but never they never talk about themselves masturbating women, or there being thirty-two different ways women masturbate! And I didn't even know one. I thought women masturbated by putting something inside. Masturbation had still for me a real pejorative context, like it's not a real thing, or that's just what women do when they don't have a man. A frustrated woman would want to stick something in her, I thought, but it could never be as good as a cock. I guess that's why men think a woman needs a man, that she could never masturbate herself as well as a man could-I've heard that so many times.But really a woman could just put a vibrator or her hand on her mons and just come and come and come.
Anyway, getting back to the first time I gave her clitorial stimulation, after a while when I kept trying, she was really excited and breathing heavy, her whole body was tensing up with her legs tight together and straight out-and then she got really tense and tight and moaned and held herself like that foe a few minutes. Then she told me she came. It was a revelation for me.
Of all the things we had done before that-like when we were kissing and I could hear her moaning, her head is right by my ear sometimes, and I was listening and I could feel her breathing- never was it that exciting, it was so thrilling during her orgasm. I felt like she was really strong! That was my first reaction to the whole thing-that she had tremendous strength-a really powerful energy that was inside her. Also, I felt really small next to her when she had an orgasm and I didn't!
I also felt like-well, I used to believe that the idea was to fuck until you both had orgasms together, but all of the sudden I realized it was a really good feeling to enjoy someone else's orgasm, even if I didn't have one. Plus, to discover that she could have one that made me envious-plus I think she had another one about a minute later-well, I was really amazed! Later, after we did it a lot, I really got to enjoy it. She feels energetic and powerful and independent when she orgasms, and it makes me feel good to be next to someone so strong and active and alive.
Do you know the difference between being next to a really passive person and someone that's really excited? It makes me feel great, it makes me feel really excited, aroused, like having orgasms, really strong, it makes me feel like an animal. I just want to hop on and screw her at that point, and I often do.
But I consider my masturbating her one of the major things we do. I don't consider it a warm-up thing. Sometimes when we don't do it, I miss doing it. Sometimes she's said things to me while I'm doing it that make me feel really good or really hot. I get sweaty when I'm doing it, and I like that feeling a lot....